Feeling Freedom

Yo.

It's been a while. Quite a while. :P But I'm finally free. I handed in my Masters' thesis for examination three days ago and my defense is scheduled for next week. The weeks and months of agonizing work reading journal articles and writing 300 pages and editing down to 200 pages, it's all essentially over. These last few days have been so great. Being able to think and not have this giant looming threat of failure hanging over me. The funniest thing though is how God really humbled me through this.

See, I reaaaaaally didn't want to sit down and write it. I'd do almost anything else to avoid doing it and it got to the point where I was actually running out of time. (For some reason I had been scheduling to finish ahead of the actual due date, so there was flexibility, but yaaaa.) So here I am like 3 days before it's due, knowing exactly how much I need to do and just being like "naaaaah, let's sleep in a bit more. ... 7:21. fineeeeee. I guess I have to wake up and start." And so I went to get up and get ready for the day and as I was standing in the bathroom I started feeling faint. So I sat down on the bathtub.

...

*opens eyes* "what's this white thing? where am I?" *sits up* I had fainted and was lying on the ground with my head facing the toilet. =O So, I go to lie in my bed. 7:23. This had only happened once before (exactly the same way) way back in 3rd or 4th year, so I know it's nothing serious. Lying down I realize my knee hurts. I can't extend my left leg and walking on it is painful. Sooooooo I hop over to my laptop to start working. I figure, "well, if it stops hurting we're all good. It had better not be broken. I have a defense in a couple weeks and work in a few days." A couple hours later and it still hurts. So I'm like "fine. I guess I'll go to the hospital just to be sure. Like, if I don't get this moving, my knee will like solidify over and I'll never get to use it again. Either I go now or after I hand in this thesis. And by then it could be too late." My roommate isn't here. My friend who lives the closest is out of town for another day. It's not an emergency.

So I check the bus schedule. The bus a couple blocks down actually goes right to the hospital. I just need to leave enough time to hop down the hall to the elevator, and slowly hop without slipping and dying to the bus stop, take the bus, then hop to the hospital. Got all my stuff. Let's go.

Hopping that entire hallway was exhausting. So when I get downstairs I call a cab. :P He was super nice. The doctors were super nice. Was there for like 2? 3 hours? Read a book. They said it was probably just a muscle thing and I'd be fine in a day or too, Cool. So I got a pair of crutches and walked to the bus. :P It only really hurt when it was extended or had weight on it.

Back at home time to work. :P

Oh, did I mention my glasses had fallen apart that week too? So, here I am with like a meter of clear vision and the inability to walk, essentially forced to tackle my thesis, praying that my leg heals quickly so I can work this coming week. New Years comes and I'm just at home working on my thesis all night. So I take a break before midnight. It'd been the first time in 7 years that I hadn't been at a Christian conference singing and praying in the year. I do my annual reflection and prayer and crying session, reminding myself of His faithfulness and goodness and the hope I have in Him, before getting back to work.

So, working as normal, drinking lots of water, I take leg stretching breaks every time after I go the washroom. I'm regaining some extension, but it still hurts and I can't really walk properly, So I just take a break and pray kneeling on my bed to help stretch it further. And afterward, with really no sudden thing, it feels back to normal. Praise God. :P And better than that, I think my relationship with God was much better too. It's funny, but it all worked out (aside from my parents being overly concerned about me, and me not bathing for a couple days. ;P) and I'm thankful that God does things like this in my life. I'm praying the defense goes well and that this year is all for His glory and my joy in Him.

D.Fa