long-time. Oh, well.
So, anyways, my church is doing a "Bible study" for lent this year and it's like the first time that they've offered a Bible study group so I eventually expressed interest in joining it. Idk. I'm kinda mad right now. So many things said or implied go so hard against what I've known and believed and want to know and believe. And, as one woman asked "are there references?" the answer was originally "yes, in the scholars version of that text" but ended up being "well, no one really said that, it's just how it is in Hebrew times" which is ... lacking.
Long story short: the study is an extension on a "contemporary re-writing of the Bible" with a feminist twist, broken down into bite-sized chunks with a chapter of what sounds like background information to better help you think through various things.
Admittedly, I was only told what part to read this morning and I did not get home with enough time to do so. So, I was reading it while the group rambled on zoom. I tried to pay attention when things sounded important. But i really don't know what the point of this meeting was. We barely talked about the specifics of the text, nor did we literally read a single Bible verse during the meeting. There were three main questions after the chapter, which were jumping off points into irrelevant conversation.
Oh, I long for the days of real Bible study.
We would read the scripture multiple times. We would dissect it. The good Bible studies came with well-referenced supporting documents. We would jump off of that to apply it to our lives. We would end with prayer because ultimately it's gonna be God helping us to do whatever we were led to do by the Word and the Spirit in us encouraging each of us.
Why are we talking about how the Bible was put together with random little bits of things we might remember? If that's the point we need a document helping us learn those details. Why are we talking about whether or not the Bible has an overarching plot/point or not if that isn't the point either? Was that the point? I don't even know. Why didn't we discuss: a) what was the point of that chapter? b) what is it making us question? and c) what is the Biblical / other supporting documents pointing us to for a solution? Why are we not walking away from this with a feeling of resolution? Why does it feel like everyone was just making things up for an hour and no one knows anything? Even if we ended without a clear direction to an answer we should have prayed about it, shouldn't we?
Did I learn something? I have no idea. I think I may have learned that my fragile hopes that this older man who kept pushing for a bible study had any chance of actually being knowledgeable and useful for spiritual development may have been misguided. They kept saying he has a wealth of Biblical expertise. Does he have expertise because everyone else on this zoom call has read the Bible only a couple times in their 60-75 years of literacy?
Is the question of the authorship of the Bible and the assertion that God had a direct role in inspiring the writers a big question? Yes. No doubt. Will we come to any conclusion by polling the audience? No.
I've been in a nostalgic kind of feeling this week. I wrote a very long letter resigning my membership from my previous church and exhorting the board to do things properly. It was a strange place to be writing to the church board that they need to do things by the Bible better if they want to keep the word Bible in their name, while at the same time feeling very rusty about quoting any scripture personally because I haven't done a full read through in a couple years. I was coming to this study ready to shoot down anything that didn't make sense. But I assumed there'd be less people and that we'd be studying the Bible. So idk.
I'm upset.
I'm sad.
I'm mad.
I miss the old days for sure.
Let's see where this goes.
See ya later? No! Ttyl. (There we go. I can remember some of how to do this I think)
D.Fa
PS. I have a new job, my parents are older, love and loss is so painful, and he better get a job soon.
