Bitter isn't Bad.

Hey guys,

Since I don't have an official job for the summer my dad has made a list of things I can do around the house. This includes going through our storage spaces and getting rid of anything we don't need; completely painting a redoing a room; as well as normal regular maintenance. One such thing is mowing the lawns in front and back yards regularly.

It's mostly dandelions in our backyard, but upon a quick scan I saw a small flowering bush which we used to have. They call it the 'Bleeding hearts' bush because of the shape of the flowers. And if I mowed, they would be dead for a year at least for sure. So I purposed to save them.

When I thought of that I wondered how many other types of plants there were in the backyard and started to compile a list. I also found some plants which were unexpected and have yet to find some that were expected. Felt like a true adventurer after all the work digging and exploring. Still more to do, but I think I have located about 25 species of plants back here.

I really expected to find some chives since we used to have a planter with lots of them. Haven't found that yet. However, I found a patch of large mint plants and what I think is parsley (tbd). So I started to wonder a bit about what things were and what was edible and did some Internet research. Last night I had a 'foraged' dandelion and mint salad with berries, coconut oil, and almonds.

One website I looked at spoke about how it used to be that people considered there to be a 'good bitter' and a 'bad bitter'. Although dandelion is bitter, it is fully edible and rich in vitamins to help us grow. When I was growing up though, I'm pretty sure us kids thought it was poisonous and everyone is always trying to get rid of them.

And I think this is how we usually approach difficulty or hardship in our lives. We try to avoid it, we try to remove it. But ultimately it is there to grow our character, as well as our hope.

Yesterday I also got to meet up with a buddy of mine as well as a sister in Christ and it was a pleasure of both my buddy and myself to hear of her joy in Jesus even through the difficulty of depression or anxiety. Although they are difficult situations and she wishes it was gone, she delights in the small victories and ways God provides, as well as looking forward to the hope we have in Jesus. As it says in Rev21:1-5: "Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away." And he who was seated on the throne said, "Behold, I am making all things new." Also he said, "Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.""

Especially the words of verses 4 and 5, God will remove every tear, death, pain, and suffering; He will make us and everything new. That is our hope! That although sin has caused pain and difficulty now, through Jesus and trusting in what He has done at the cross, we have been forgiven, adopted as God's children, and awaiting the day when all things will be made new again, free from that pain and sin's grip of destruction.

But even through that difficulty God provides and helps us trust in this ultimate ending! For now is but a light and momentary affliction which is incomparable to the glory that will be revealed in Jesus.

Rom5:3-5; Rom8:18-25.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Changing Gears

The other day I was talking with a good brother of mine and I think he said something very simple, but very profound: "is there any progress at all?"

I had been somewhat complaining to him about how deep I feel the depths of sin in my heart and mind are, that even now it sometimes feels like there's nothing but wrong on my mind. But he asked if there was any progress. He admitted it wasn't something that was easily quantifiable and is more of a long term process, but further clarified:

"Have I grown to be / walk more like Christ since last year, even since last month if you can see the difference?
Am i drawing towards God more?

Am i yearning for Him and his word more?

Has He become more of what ultimately satisfies, the one we find joy and pleasure in over other things?

How have you seen God work in your life lately?

And it doesn't meant you're always right with God, sometimes you can feel lonely, but have you seen him transforming you?

What steps are you taking to combat this sin?

Have you just sat there and been content or are you aggressively fighting?

Is fighting this sin a priority in your life, where does it stand?"

"Have you seen progress?"

Sometimes, often, I want to skip to the ending where all the progress is done already. And I had been thinking about it lately as I've been biking. Whenever I come to a hill, my first response is to see it coming and pedal as fast as I can on the highest gear before I get to the hill and just use the momentum to keep pedaling at that speed and get to the top. For smaller hills this seems to work well, but for larger hills, it invariably does not work. Soon the hill makes it so you cannot even pedal, and you may have to walk the bike up the hill.

The idea of switching gears had always seemed kinda dumb to me.

When you switch to a lower gear you can't go as fast. If there is a hill, you'll spend more time on it barely moving. But when you switch to a lower gear it is easier to pedal uphill. Although you end up going a little slower, sometimes a lot slower, you are making progress! And at the top of the hill you will not have been so out of breath and wouldn't have had to walk to bike up the hill.

I live on a hill, so every time I bike I need to go up a hill. haha.

But in our lives with Christ, there will be hills, there will be mountains even. But by the Holy Spirit, even if it takes time and may be difficult, He can move mountains and bring everything to completion on the day of Jesus Christ. What He has started He will finish.

D.Fa

Check on the Bucketlist

Yo.

Kinda funny. Today was really great. Various reasons. Good time with God. Watched some anime. Shared the gospel. Pretty sweet time in the Bible with other Young Adults. Probably the funniest to say is  that I shared the gospel through anime, specifically a show called "is it wrong to try to pick up girls in a dungeon?"

Don't get me wrong, I know the title sounds bad. The show is actually quite good. The plot is very thin "that girl saved me! I like her. I want to be strong enough that I could save her, then she'd like me!", but the content can be very good. Recently as the main character, Bell, has been going into the dungeon to fight monsters he's brought a supporter, someone to carry dropped items and be back-up fighting support. The supporter he got had a shady background and stole his most precious knife and ran. She got caught by some bad guys who took all her stuff and left her with a swarm of giant ant monsters, which she had no way of fighting. So she just has seconds before getting killed. And this isn't a game. In this anime, this is the world, not a game. If you die, you die. So she is laying on the ground, beat up, and imminent death:

"I guess this is what I deserve for deceiving Bell-sama, who was so nice to me.

If that's true, then maybe I should give up.

But it hurts.

God, why..?

Why did you make me like this?

I hate myself for being so weak and small

and nothing ever changes for me.

I was so lonely.

I wanted to be with someone.

I wanted to be needed.

But... 

It's over now. I can finally die.

I can finally end this.

The me who can't do anything.

The weak me.
The small me.

The worthless me.

The lonely me.

I'm finally going to ... am I going to die?!"

So she's thinking all through how terrible she's been and how this is what she deserves, but the reality hits her that she is actually going to die. Meanwhile, some of the main character's friends are talking about how he should ditch this supporter, but "no matter what happens, he won't abandon that supporter." and flashback to the morning when Bell was talking to his friend "even if that's true, if she's in trouble, I want to help her." So BAM! out of no where Bell comes in and fights the swarm of giant ants with his knife and some magic.

"Why?

Why did you save me?

Why aren't you avandoning me?

Wait, do you not understand that I was tricking you?

(she confesses all the bad stuff she did: stealing a knife, lying about the gold and drops, saying mean things, etc.)

Don't you understand? I'm a bad person! A thief! I'm the worst kind of jerk! I've done nothing but lie to you! Will you... Will you save me anyway?"

"Yup."

"Why?"

'Because it's you. I wanted to save you because you're you. I can't find another reason. I don't need another reason to save you. If you're in trouble, talk to me. I won't understand everything, but I'll save you.'

And so she throws herself into his arms, bawling, and apologizing.

I asked my friend, who is also watching this show, about if he related at all with the supporter girl. And explained how I thought the whole scene was reminiscent of how God came to save us even though we fully didn't deserve it, but deserved to die for all the ways we've lied and cheated and rebelled against God, His creation, other people made in His image, and even the plans He has for us, as we seek after selfish goals and ambitions, various as they may be.

In any case, I'd been dying to share the gospel using anime, and so, I'm counting this as an answered prayer. xP. God is pretty cool. haha

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Jumps and Flats

Yo,

so a few days ago I was biking to church. It was a nice relaxing 30 minute ride. While on this ride I determined to learn how to do something: get over curbs by jumping up onto them with the front wheel. Now, this is actually pretty simple, you just pull up sharply when riding and the front wheel will jump off the ground a bit while you are still moving forward and fall down on top of the curb. But I had never realized this. Watching kids do this, it seems like a lot of work and pretty dangerous. But in actuality is so simple! So, I'm kinda obsessed with it now, and I feel so cool doing it! It's like having another childhood.

But really, I love biking. I can't talk highly about it enough. I highly recommend it. xP

However, I also highly recommend buying your own bike pump. I have had terrible luck with free pumps lately. When I got my new bike from BR when he left for Texas the front tire was flat, so I brought the pump MM had given me way back when (it was kinda rusty, admittedly) and it didn't pump up. Must be flat, I thought. So I took the inner tube out and found it wasn't punctured. So I needed to walk over to AS's and use her pump. The other day, I was at school and there's this bike fixing station by the Architecture building and there's a pump. So I went to top off my tires. #Fshooooooooooooooooooooo.........# > . <## It was now flat............... Tried for 15 minutes to get it to work...... Nope. Called up AS. haha... I swear I'll get a pump soon.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Assorted Tales

Yo guys,

I've been really all over the place lately, both figuratively and literally. haha. To start, I've decided against getting a job for the summer. As such I will need to save as much money as possible before my grad school funding starts coming in in September.

One way I am intending to do that is by biking everywhere all summer. This started a week or so ago and the amount of biking has steadily increased from about 5 minute trips to 30 minute trips. I really like biking. Ever since my housemate back in 2nd year got me a bike and convinced me to bike to school. Then in Saskatoon I was also too cheap to buy a bus pass, so I got a kijiji bike and biked 15 minutes to work each day. It was so good. Just the freedom of being able to bike wherever, whenever, for free is so great. Especially with this perfect Ottawa summer weather.

To enjoy the weather further I've signed up for a membership with a local tennis club. It was $50 for the entire season! So cheap! And I convinced JF to join too. xP. So I'll be playing all the time. We joined the ladder too, so about 8 games per month at least. The practice game we played last week was good. After having been off for a while I can relearn how to serve well. I ended up getting a number of aces! =D But it was a typical match for me where I kind of trail just behind the guy I'm playing. The score ended up being 8-7 for JF where he was only ever ahead by 1 or 2 games, but we ended up usually being tied. (5 deuces in one game. haha) He said "You've got a talent, I'm not sure what it is, but you've got it." I always say it was my brother's doing (if I started winning he got angry).

Speaking of anger, knitting is very relaxing. haha. Unless you're knitting a blanket! This thing is 16 x 17 squares right now (each square a 18x10 garter stitch knit square, worsted weight, acrylic, size 9 needles) so roughly about 40 inches by 40 inches. Roughly. The intention is for a sitting blanket when you're cold on a couch. Nearly done! Not... Estimated to be another 27-60 hours of non-stop knitting. But I'm done with 1 of the 3 colours, but I might want to do a final border in the 1st colour. I really don't want to buy more yarn though. lol. Can't wait to start other projects! =D

Finally, a project I'd like to start up is relearning how to play trombone! Now that I'm free / I'll be a grad student in September, I'd like to join a band, whichever one NF was in (a Carleton band I think). So I need to learn trombone again and my mother can come listen. This is also partially caused by my current favourite anime: "Hibike! Euphonium". It's so good!!! Today's episode was about a concert band marching competition and they packed up all the instruments in a moving truck and went to the competition. "the male students are very useful in these situations" or something. Very true. They didn't need to move all the percussion though. haha.

I'll ttyl about more stuff.

D.Fa