!!!!
Context: Luke 15.
!!! What is the younger brother actually asked his dad for the inheritance because he thought he'd never be worthy to deserve it. After seeing how his brother slaved away day and night he realized the money wasn't worth all that toil and labour and on the off-chance that his dad would give it to him if he asked, he did, and somehow got it?!
Is this what self-righteousness does to others?
I'm sorry. I tend to be an overachiever. How does that make others feel? When I boast about how excited I am about what will happen because of all our work and planning, how does that make you feel?
I've been in that place, in the shadow of the over achiever, their names are very clear to me. I would never have been able to live up to their standards, so I set my own and waited until they were out of the picture, allowing the bar to drop so I could be at the top once they had lift-off from this reality.
I'm sorry if that is how I make you feel.
How does this make me feel? The standards of over-achievement are also extremely difficult. Are they necessary? Should I feel guilty when I don't live up to them? Should I have been more realistic?
Grace.
We sang of You and Your great majesty all day. Not because we had to. Not because we needed to, but because we wanted to. May You be blessed.
D.Fa
4.8.14
Images and Incarnation - KG Ch4+5
Yo, within the last two weeks I read two chapters of Knowing God by J.I. Packer.
The fourth chapter was called "The Only True God" and I guess the thing I am still reflecting on a bit is essentially that the chapter was about not idolizing anything, which again lined up with what I had been reading in Romans 1. But then it threw me a screw ball when the chapter quickly switched into talking about images of God. "Idolatry consists not only in the worship of false gods, but also in the worship of the true God by images." (p.44)
o.O
Now, this statement really struck me because I can clearly see many ways that I have been encouraged to praise God by images, or how normal it is. Be it stained glass. Be it pictures in church of Jesus. Be it different "images" of the gospel each capturing a different aspect. Be it watching a film about Jesus' life. Be it a crucifix with Jesus on it. These all present images of God for the benefit of us being able to better focus on all God is and has done.
The chapter goes further to go beyond "molten images" (those that are physical and visible, those made by hands) to the images we get in our head, the "mental images".
"The realization that images and pictures of God affect our thoughts of God points to a further realm in which the prohibition of the second commandment applies. Just as it forbids us to manufacture molten images of God, so it forbids us to dream up mental images of him. Imagining God in our heads can be just as real a breach of the second commandment as imagining him by the works of our hands." (pg47)
Examples include "the great architect", "judge", "Father". And the main reasons all of these images shouldn't be used it that they either present false images of God, or they can obscure his glory. Although he is strong and noble as a golden calf, he is soooooo much more and that gives such a reduced image. Although he is the great creator and made everything beautifully, he is more. Although he is ultimately the righteous judge, and redeemer, and atoned for us, he is so much more. Although he is our heavenly father, he is so much more. No image can properly capture his greatness, some deny facets of his greatness, others even those that imagine a superhuman or more, any image we create, rightfully limits his immeasurable greatness.
"The world by wisdom knew not God" 1Cor1:21 KJV.
"In this light, the positive purpose of the second commandment becomes plain. Negatively, it is a warning against ways of worship and religious practice that lead us to dishonor God and to falsify his truth. Positively it is a summons to us to recognize that God the Creator is transcendent, mysterious and inscrutable, beyond the range of any imagining or philosophical guesswork of which we are capable--and hence a summons to us to humble ourselves, to listen and learn of him, and to let him teach us what he is like and how we should think of him." (pg50) (see also Isa55:8-9 and Rom11:33-34)
Packer encourages us to look to the knowledge of God revealed in His Son Jesus, reflecting on the life and works of God, the very image of God shown in Jesus reflecting the nature and grace of God bodily. With the additional note addressed to concerns of this chapter and images for personal devotion that "some risks are not worth taking".
------------------------
The fifth chapter spoke of miracles and debate on those points as causes of doubt and difficulty, but that the real difficulty, the real stumbling block is that God would become man. Both diving into concepts of the trinity and the union of God and man.
The main passage Packer looks at here is John1 where the Word, who was with God and was God and all things came to be through him, in whom was life, who was the light of men; the Word became flesh. He expounds upon this passage to show the eternity, personality, deity, creating, animating, revealing, incarnate nature expressed in the passage. The baby born was God.
Packer continues and gets into the thoughts about the kenosis theory, the theories based on Phil2:7 where he literally 'emptied himself' as he became man. But holds firm that "The Word had become flesh: a real human baby. He had not ceased to be God; he was no less God then than before; but he had begun to be man. He was not now God minus some elements of his deity, but God plus all that he had made his own by taking manhood to himself." (pg57) After explaining and reviewing thoughts he gives this statement "The impression of Jesus which the Gospels give is not that he was wholly bereft of divine knowledge and power, but that he drew on both intermittently, while being content for much of the time not to do so." (pg61) and the idea that all he did was based on the Father's will, even if not knowing everything at that time was part of that as well.
the finale of the chapter was to restate what the incarnation was all about: God had become poor so that we may become rich through him. He had left his glory to come and be born and ultimately die that we may once again have the ability to know God.
-D.Fa
The fourth chapter was called "The Only True God" and I guess the thing I am still reflecting on a bit is essentially that the chapter was about not idolizing anything, which again lined up with what I had been reading in Romans 1. But then it threw me a screw ball when the chapter quickly switched into talking about images of God. "Idolatry consists not only in the worship of false gods, but also in the worship of the true God by images." (p.44)
o.O
Now, this statement really struck me because I can clearly see many ways that I have been encouraged to praise God by images, or how normal it is. Be it stained glass. Be it pictures in church of Jesus. Be it different "images" of the gospel each capturing a different aspect. Be it watching a film about Jesus' life. Be it a crucifix with Jesus on it. These all present images of God for the benefit of us being able to better focus on all God is and has done.
The chapter goes further to go beyond "molten images" (those that are physical and visible, those made by hands) to the images we get in our head, the "mental images".
"The realization that images and pictures of God affect our thoughts of God points to a further realm in which the prohibition of the second commandment applies. Just as it forbids us to manufacture molten images of God, so it forbids us to dream up mental images of him. Imagining God in our heads can be just as real a breach of the second commandment as imagining him by the works of our hands." (pg47)
Examples include "the great architect", "judge", "Father". And the main reasons all of these images shouldn't be used it that they either present false images of God, or they can obscure his glory. Although he is strong and noble as a golden calf, he is soooooo much more and that gives such a reduced image. Although he is the great creator and made everything beautifully, he is more. Although he is ultimately the righteous judge, and redeemer, and atoned for us, he is so much more. Although he is our heavenly father, he is so much more. No image can properly capture his greatness, some deny facets of his greatness, others even those that imagine a superhuman or more, any image we create, rightfully limits his immeasurable greatness.
"The world by wisdom knew not God" 1Cor1:21 KJV.
"In this light, the positive purpose of the second commandment becomes plain. Negatively, it is a warning against ways of worship and religious practice that lead us to dishonor God and to falsify his truth. Positively it is a summons to us to recognize that God the Creator is transcendent, mysterious and inscrutable, beyond the range of any imagining or philosophical guesswork of which we are capable--and hence a summons to us to humble ourselves, to listen and learn of him, and to let him teach us what he is like and how we should think of him." (pg50) (see also Isa55:8-9 and Rom11:33-34)
Packer encourages us to look to the knowledge of God revealed in His Son Jesus, reflecting on the life and works of God, the very image of God shown in Jesus reflecting the nature and grace of God bodily. With the additional note addressed to concerns of this chapter and images for personal devotion that "some risks are not worth taking".
------------------------
The fifth chapter spoke of miracles and debate on those points as causes of doubt and difficulty, but that the real difficulty, the real stumbling block is that God would become man. Both diving into concepts of the trinity and the union of God and man.
The main passage Packer looks at here is John1 where the Word, who was with God and was God and all things came to be through him, in whom was life, who was the light of men; the Word became flesh. He expounds upon this passage to show the eternity, personality, deity, creating, animating, revealing, incarnate nature expressed in the passage. The baby born was God.
Packer continues and gets into the thoughts about the kenosis theory, the theories based on Phil2:7 where he literally 'emptied himself' as he became man. But holds firm that "The Word had become flesh: a real human baby. He had not ceased to be God; he was no less God then than before; but he had begun to be man. He was not now God minus some elements of his deity, but God plus all that he had made his own by taking manhood to himself." (pg57) After explaining and reviewing thoughts he gives this statement "The impression of Jesus which the Gospels give is not that he was wholly bereft of divine knowledge and power, but that he drew on both intermittently, while being content for much of the time not to do so." (pg61) and the idea that all he did was based on the Father's will, even if not knowing everything at that time was part of that as well.
the finale of the chapter was to restate what the incarnation was all about: God had become poor so that we may become rich through him. He had left his glory to come and be born and ultimately die that we may once again have the ability to know God.
-D.Fa
3.8.14
Nostalgic Impulses
Now here is the thing, I am normally very structured, stick to the rules, try and get others to follow them, and am quick to judge impulsive actions or wasteful spending.
however, I am also someone who will suddenly drift into nostalgia and spend hours if not days doing things because they are nostalgic, I will go to great lengths to achieve the things which aren't very profitable (or sometimes even as enjoyable) because they are nostalgic.
A few weeks ago I just had to watch Death Note. So I started, and it got to that point where the Death Note isn't being used and I just had to watch 8 episodes until it started being used by the main character again. I didn't care / I thought it wasn't that many episodes. So, I ended up watching it in like 3 days. > . >
This last week I wanted to play a game on my Nintendo DS. I had been playing a lot of random flash games online, mostly tower defense, and started missing a game I had for DS, Ninja Town. I never beat it. Also, ninjas. Also, a tower defense game.
I couldn't find my DS. > . > It's gotta be around here somewhere, but I was so sure it was in the box. I don't think I had played it since I had last moved, but idk. Anyways, I quickly moved on to the Nintendo 64 that was living in my parents' basement. All the pieces were here. And a few games. Sooooo, I got to 93% of the Crystal Shards on Kirby in like 3 days. haha. . . My best single play through record yet, but not worth the additional time spent going back (at this time) to find those last pieces without walkthroughs (since I am a completionist, a walkthrough snob (using them is admitting defeat! But you need to get to 100%!!), but also too busy at the moment).
I also ended up on kijiji to get more controllers so we could play Smash Brothers (the original N64 version!! Purposes include YA and inviting other friends to my house) and ended up perusing some of the other N64 wares available. Needless to say, I ended up making a purchase.
I biked about 20 minutes to get the controllers last Tuesday.
I biked 54 km, with another 30 minutes of bus ride, in a round trip to get three games (and a back-up N64).
Now, I really didn't want to bike that far. My bike is falling apart. I've never biked that far. I don't have the time for that. I don't especially have money to spare at the moment. This seems impulsive.
I went.
But it was amazing. haha. It was ~20km East of the Gatineau-Ottawa bridge. It was such a great bike ride along the river for a good 20 minutes, and then a bunch of houses, but it was great. Afterwards, waiting for the cousin of the kijiji person (currently in Alberta without cell service apparently), I got time to spend reading Hebrews, praying, and just relaxing basking in God's creation. So good. My legs did start hurting a bit on the way home, but it wasn't bad. My gear shift broke like a half kilometer from my house (I didn't use it much anyways, but it's a little annoying. haha). It honestly took 6 hours to go, wait, and to get back home. But it was good.
I watched "Yes Man" a couple weeks ago. I feel like it is very suitable to my situation.
I want to make my yes yes and my no no, and to not have so much in between, and so much hesitation. I don't want to be a hypocrite. I want to be a good steward of all that God has given me. I'm glad that taking the time to go wasn't just a waste, but a good chance to see God's creation in a way I never had (I like biking way more now. haha) and to just chill apart from all the busyness in Ottawa.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
PS. I also got a BIG sunburn. lol...... 6 hours outside in the sun will do that. haha
however, I am also someone who will suddenly drift into nostalgia and spend hours if not days doing things because they are nostalgic, I will go to great lengths to achieve the things which aren't very profitable (or sometimes even as enjoyable) because they are nostalgic.
A few weeks ago I just had to watch Death Note. So I started, and it got to that point where the Death Note isn't being used and I just had to watch 8 episodes until it started being used by the main character again. I didn't care / I thought it wasn't that many episodes. So, I ended up watching it in like 3 days. > . >
This last week I wanted to play a game on my Nintendo DS. I had been playing a lot of random flash games online, mostly tower defense, and started missing a game I had for DS, Ninja Town. I never beat it. Also, ninjas. Also, a tower defense game.
I couldn't find my DS. > . > It's gotta be around here somewhere, but I was so sure it was in the box. I don't think I had played it since I had last moved, but idk. Anyways, I quickly moved on to the Nintendo 64 that was living in my parents' basement. All the pieces were here. And a few games. Sooooo, I got to 93% of the Crystal Shards on Kirby in like 3 days. haha. . . My best single play through record yet, but not worth the additional time spent going back (at this time) to find those last pieces without walkthroughs (since I am a completionist, a walkthrough snob (using them is admitting defeat! But you need to get to 100%!!), but also too busy at the moment).
I also ended up on kijiji to get more controllers so we could play Smash Brothers (the original N64 version!! Purposes include YA and inviting other friends to my house) and ended up perusing some of the other N64 wares available. Needless to say, I ended up making a purchase.
I biked about 20 minutes to get the controllers last Tuesday.
I biked 54 km, with another 30 minutes of bus ride, in a round trip to get three games (and a back-up N64).
Now, I really didn't want to bike that far. My bike is falling apart. I've never biked that far. I don't have the time for that. I don't especially have money to spare at the moment. This seems impulsive.
I went.
But it was amazing. haha. It was ~20km East of the Gatineau-Ottawa bridge. It was such a great bike ride along the river for a good 20 minutes, and then a bunch of houses, but it was great. Afterwards, waiting for the cousin of the kijiji person (currently in Alberta without cell service apparently), I got time to spend reading Hebrews, praying, and just relaxing basking in God's creation. So good. My legs did start hurting a bit on the way home, but it wasn't bad. My gear shift broke like a half kilometer from my house (I didn't use it much anyways, but it's a little annoying. haha). It honestly took 6 hours to go, wait, and to get back home. But it was good.
I watched "Yes Man" a couple weeks ago. I feel like it is very suitable to my situation.
I want to make my yes yes and my no no, and to not have so much in between, and so much hesitation. I don't want to be a hypocrite. I want to be a good steward of all that God has given me. I'm glad that taking the time to go wasn't just a waste, but a good chance to see God's creation in a way I never had (I like biking way more now. haha) and to just chill apart from all the busyness in Ottawa.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
PS. I also got a BIG sunburn. lol...... 6 hours outside in the sun will do that. haha
17.7.14
Opinions and Thoughts
I don't really know how to live life anymore.
I don't mean I want to die right now. I mean I don't understand how to live my life.
The life I have been given is extremely complicated, and if it were not for the great hope that is in Christ it would be the biggest vanity of vanities and not worth my time. Although I don't typically think aloud, I think quite a bit about different theoretical outcomes of potential futures to this life. The life which leads down to a life spent in a homosexual relationship pleads with my flesh to allow such a thing, but to my thoughts, this life would not be satisfying because it would be one where, although my flesh would be 'satisfied' to whatever extent that would actually be the case, I would then be living a life devoid of my relationship with God and the hope and joy and peace and life that is truly life that only He can give. And so, although in my actions I bounce back and forth on what may look like support for either side of that question, I would much prefer to live life in purity rather than homosexuality.
However, this and further thoughts can often be difficult to explain or even understand, and thus the reason I spend so much time thinking about hypotheticals and trying to determine what I should and should not be saying explicitly in public venues based on how it could potentially impact my other hypothetical futures and also, I don't really like having strong opinions or arguing with people, which, is an issue I think that I need to deal with at some point. Even just an argumentative tone, despite genuine desire to learn and hear out the other side of an argument, is enough to make me wrench at the thought of continuing such a discussion. However, the opinion that Christ, according to His own words, is the way, the truth, and the life, and that no one come to God except by Him, is a very strong opinion to have. So, I do need to deal with this aversion, additionally in regards to my struggles and how they can be used to help others going through such things and those who although don't understand fully would like to help those who are.
Thus, I do have respect for such an article as the one linked below, and these are all thoughts I have had before. I hate loneliness and that thought had crossed my mind, and it did feel like a death sentence. And so I rejected it, but that just makes things complicated.
But complication is better than death.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
Article: http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/orienting-on-homosexual-orientation
I don't mean I want to die right now. I mean I don't understand how to live my life.
The life I have been given is extremely complicated, and if it were not for the great hope that is in Christ it would be the biggest vanity of vanities and not worth my time. Although I don't typically think aloud, I think quite a bit about different theoretical outcomes of potential futures to this life. The life which leads down to a life spent in a homosexual relationship pleads with my flesh to allow such a thing, but to my thoughts, this life would not be satisfying because it would be one where, although my flesh would be 'satisfied' to whatever extent that would actually be the case, I would then be living a life devoid of my relationship with God and the hope and joy and peace and life that is truly life that only He can give. And so, although in my actions I bounce back and forth on what may look like support for either side of that question, I would much prefer to live life in purity rather than homosexuality.
However, this and further thoughts can often be difficult to explain or even understand, and thus the reason I spend so much time thinking about hypotheticals and trying to determine what I should and should not be saying explicitly in public venues based on how it could potentially impact my other hypothetical futures and also, I don't really like having strong opinions or arguing with people, which, is an issue I think that I need to deal with at some point. Even just an argumentative tone, despite genuine desire to learn and hear out the other side of an argument, is enough to make me wrench at the thought of continuing such a discussion. However, the opinion that Christ, according to His own words, is the way, the truth, and the life, and that no one come to God except by Him, is a very strong opinion to have. So, I do need to deal with this aversion, additionally in regards to my struggles and how they can be used to help others going through such things and those who although don't understand fully would like to help those who are.
Thus, I do have respect for such an article as the one linked below, and these are all thoughts I have had before. I hate loneliness and that thought had crossed my mind, and it did feel like a death sentence. And so I rejected it, but that just makes things complicated.
But complication is better than death.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
Article: http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/orienting-on-homosexual-orientation
16.7.14
Mortify the Sin Alive in You! - OS+T:M:Ch2
This again was a chapter that caught my eye when I read it at first. The chapter stresses the importance of mortification, the fact that we are either killing sin or being killed by it, and goes so far as to even call out those who claim to be Christian and yet live as carnally as any other.
Largely the chapter speaks of the continual fact that sin is alive in us while we are alive on this earth, no matter how much we seek to deny this by changing the criteria by which holiness may be evaluated, if we are true to the level and standards of what is truly holy we know that in us lies nothing good other than the Spirit who has been given us which is in constant and direct opposition to the sin in us. |And that daily mortification of sin must be our duty.
The biggest idea that struck me was that sin never stops, but desires to push forward to the largest and worst sin of its type. What may start as a quick lustful glance, if not killed, will stop at nothing until it has fulfilled the deepest and darkest deeds related to lustful living. And in so many cases we settle and compromise with sin saying that so long as it not be getting worse, it is fine as it is. That is to allow what is a small wound to stay a wound lest it grow larger. Rather than to heal and aim at what was good beforehand, we say 'well, it isn't that bad, it could be much worse, so this is fine.'
"This new acting and pressing forward makes the soul take little notice of what an entrance to a falling off from God is already made; it thinks all is indifferently well if there be no further progress; and so far as the soul is made insensible of any sin—that is, as to such a sense as the gospel requires—so far it is hardened: but sin is still pressing forward, and that because it has no bounds but utter relinquishment of God and opposition to him; that it proceeds toward its height by degrees, making good the ground it has got by hardness, is not from its nature, but its deceitfulness." page 53
But truly, this mortification is to be painful in some senses. How can it not be? Dying, by the nature of the action is to be painful. So our only option is to set our face against that which is evil in us and fight. To choose the Spirit over the flesh and allow the battle to be fought regardless of the pain we may suffer now. The second idea that really struck me was the idea that if you are not facing opposition, is what you are doing really good? If it is not a work that is aimed at holiness, why would sin have any reason to stop you?
"Let not that man think he makes any progress in holiness who walks not over the bellies of his lusts. He who does not kill sin in his way takes no steps toward his journey’s end. He who finds not opposition from it, and who sets not himself in every particular to its mortification, is at peace with it, not dying to it." page 55
Hmmmm.
"When a man has confirmed his imagination to such an apprehension of grace and mercy as to be able, without bitterness, to swallow and digest daily sins, that man is at the very brink of turning the grace of God into lasciviousness and being hardened by the deceitfulness of sin." page 56
"But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people." (Eph5:3)
Largely the chapter speaks of the continual fact that sin is alive in us while we are alive on this earth, no matter how much we seek to deny this by changing the criteria by which holiness may be evaluated, if we are true to the level and standards of what is truly holy we know that in us lies nothing good other than the Spirit who has been given us which is in constant and direct opposition to the sin in us. |And that daily mortification of sin must be our duty.
The biggest idea that struck me was that sin never stops, but desires to push forward to the largest and worst sin of its type. What may start as a quick lustful glance, if not killed, will stop at nothing until it has fulfilled the deepest and darkest deeds related to lustful living. And in so many cases we settle and compromise with sin saying that so long as it not be getting worse, it is fine as it is. That is to allow what is a small wound to stay a wound lest it grow larger. Rather than to heal and aim at what was good beforehand, we say 'well, it isn't that bad, it could be much worse, so this is fine.'
"This new acting and pressing forward makes the soul take little notice of what an entrance to a falling off from God is already made; it thinks all is indifferently well if there be no further progress; and so far as the soul is made insensible of any sin—that is, as to such a sense as the gospel requires—so far it is hardened: but sin is still pressing forward, and that because it has no bounds but utter relinquishment of God and opposition to him; that it proceeds toward its height by degrees, making good the ground it has got by hardness, is not from its nature, but its deceitfulness." page 53
But truly, this mortification is to be painful in some senses. How can it not be? Dying, by the nature of the action is to be painful. So our only option is to set our face against that which is evil in us and fight. To choose the Spirit over the flesh and allow the battle to be fought regardless of the pain we may suffer now. The second idea that really struck me was the idea that if you are not facing opposition, is what you are doing really good? If it is not a work that is aimed at holiness, why would sin have any reason to stop you?
"Let not that man think he makes any progress in holiness who walks not over the bellies of his lusts. He who does not kill sin in his way takes no steps toward his journey’s end. He who finds not opposition from it, and who sets not himself in every particular to its mortification, is at peace with it, not dying to it." page 55
Hmmmm.
"When a man has confirmed his imagination to such an apprehension of grace and mercy as to be able, without bitterness, to swallow and digest daily sins, that man is at the very brink of turning the grace of God into lasciviousness and being hardened by the deceitfulness of sin." page 56
"But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for God's holy people." (Eph5:3)
14.7.14
Overcoming Sin and Temptation: John Owen - Of Mortification; Chapter 1
Hey, so, this book was recommended highly by a friend of mine and seems fitting to be read. I have briefly scanned the first 4 chapters already, but as mentioned, intend to better process as I read. The pdf is available here (click to get the pdf).
I really really liked the first chapter when I read it the first time on a walk home from a friend's house (since I never normally get time to read). haha. The first chapter, essentially is an introduction to the first treatise which finds its subject matter in 'the mortification of sin in believers' which essentially is an expansion and exposition on Romans 8:13 "if you through the Spirit do put to death the deeds of the body, you shall live" (NKJV). In this chapter Owen expands briefly upon each phrase in the sentence and further expands in the subsequent chapters.
I think the idea that caught me the most was the expansion on the word 'if'. As he explains, 'if' normally either denotes and uncertainty, or a certainty (as ironic as that sounds). One way to read the verse would be 'you will live only if you do ____' 'you must do this, or else die'. Very much dependent upon your works. However, Owen explains based on the greater context of the whole that it really denotes a certainty that if this is done you will live, and further that: although it is our daily duty to mortify the flesh, the Spirit is there to help us and is the only true means to doing so; that the ones exhorted to do so are Christians already redeemed from sin and death by Jesus, now free from condemnation (8:1); and that through Jesus our eternal life is already given as a free gift not something to now be earned. So the condition is more along the lines of a patient who has already been in to see a doctor and has now been given medicine with the instructions "if you take this medicine, you will become healthy".
This is a certainty as we trust and live in Christ; you shall live. So follow me and take up your cross and deny yourself.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
I really really liked the first chapter when I read it the first time on a walk home from a friend's house (since I never normally get time to read). haha. The first chapter, essentially is an introduction to the first treatise which finds its subject matter in 'the mortification of sin in believers' which essentially is an expansion and exposition on Romans 8:13 "if you through the Spirit do put to death the deeds of the body, you shall live" (NKJV). In this chapter Owen expands briefly upon each phrase in the sentence and further expands in the subsequent chapters.
I think the idea that caught me the most was the expansion on the word 'if'. As he explains, 'if' normally either denotes and uncertainty, or a certainty (as ironic as that sounds). One way to read the verse would be 'you will live only if you do ____' 'you must do this, or else die'. Very much dependent upon your works. However, Owen explains based on the greater context of the whole that it really denotes a certainty that if this is done you will live, and further that: although it is our daily duty to mortify the flesh, the Spirit is there to help us and is the only true means to doing so; that the ones exhorted to do so are Christians already redeemed from sin and death by Jesus, now free from condemnation (8:1); and that through Jesus our eternal life is already given as a free gift not something to now be earned. So the condition is more along the lines of a patient who has already been in to see a doctor and has now been given medicine with the instructions "if you take this medicine, you will become healthy".
This is a certainty as we trust and live in Christ; you shall live. So follow me and take up your cross and deny yourself.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
Let's Start a Book Club?
Hey guys!
One thing that I have been really learning this summer is the importance of properly processing material in order to more properly apply new information. Whether this be something theoretical that I learn in class, or something very practical to work or life, if I don't take the time and process it so I understand it, it won't translate to practice.
So, I am attempting in any readings I have or choose to have, which I am prioritizing based on value given and need for specific instruction in my life, to spend time and read deeply rather than a shallow reading for the sake of it, followed by a more in depth analysis and thinking through the issues, and depending on the length of the book, potentially a quick read through again.
As part of this, I will likely be posting my thoughts on chapters of the books I read to better process and also share insights with you. xP Also, if you've ever read the book, or if there are free copies I can get you, I'd be happy to hear your thoughts on it too!
I hope you like books. haha
Ttyl.
D.Fa
One thing that I have been really learning this summer is the importance of properly processing material in order to more properly apply new information. Whether this be something theoretical that I learn in class, or something very practical to work or life, if I don't take the time and process it so I understand it, it won't translate to practice.
So, I am attempting in any readings I have or choose to have, which I am prioritizing based on value given and need for specific instruction in my life, to spend time and read deeply rather than a shallow reading for the sake of it, followed by a more in depth analysis and thinking through the issues, and depending on the length of the book, potentially a quick read through again.
As part of this, I will likely be posting my thoughts on chapters of the books I read to better process and also share insights with you. xP Also, if you've ever read the book, or if there are free copies I can get you, I'd be happy to hear your thoughts on it too!
I hope you like books. haha
Ttyl.
D.Fa
10.7.14
Openness
Knowing God.
What does that mean and how do we do it?
Essentially that is what a book I am reading right now is trying to explain. The first couple chapters were an introduction into the study of God (theology) and really the immensely (if not infinitely) greater value of knowing God compared to knowing about God.
Hmmmm.
This is even an interesting point in a verse I have been reading lately Romans 1:18-23ish. Ultimately it explains how although people know about God, we have, and still do, transfer our praise from Him to meaningless things. Verse 19 and 21 speak very clearly about this "For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them ... For although they knew [about] God, they did not honour him as God or give thanks to him". And the warning Jesus gives in Matthew 7:21-23 of those who on the last day will say 'Lord, Lord' even having done many things in His name, but will be sent off with the words, 'I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!'.
To know God.
And that should be our motive in theology (Bible study, seminary, etc.) as well as reading on the topic. "If we pursue theological knowledge for its own sake, it is bound to go bad on us. It will make us proud and conceited. The very greatness of the subject matter will intoxicate us, and we shall come to think of ourselves as a cut above other Christians because of our interest in it and grasp of it; and we shall look down on those whose theological ideas seem to us crude and inadequate and dismiss them as very poor specimens" (pg 21). And as much as I am still young in my faith, I do see this in my life sometimes. I have been blessed with so many opportunities to learn and study the word and a fairly good general knowledge of many verses. But it does become an issue of pride sometimes.
The bigger thing though is to realize that this isn't the highest thing. God's word is great, but He Himself is so much more and this is one way that He speaks to us and reveals Himself to us.
The third chapter was about being known by God and sundry examples to illustrate what knowing a living and great person is like. The biggest idea that stuck out to me came partially through the following passage on knowing people:
"In the case of human beings, te position is further complicated by the fact that ... people keep secrets. They do not show everybody all that is in their hearts. ... You may spend months and years doing things in company with another person and still have to say at the end of that time, "I don't really know him at all." We recognize degrees in our knowledge of our fellow men. We know them, we say, well, not very well, just to shake hands with, intimately, or perhaps inside out, according to how much, or how little, they have opened up to us.
"Thus, the quality and extent of our knowledge of other people depends more on them than on us. Our knowing them is more directly the result of their allowing us to know them than of our attemptinv to get to know them."
Knowing a person is based largely on how much they allow you to know.
I know this well from my own amount of openness that I can control and looking back at who would consider to know me well or not; how I have or haven't let people know me. But I had never thought of how this is also applicable to God.
Now, this is only applicable one way to God, for as it is written "God knows your hearts" (Luke16:15) and knows everything about you (see Psalm139 especially v.1-4). But the other way is God revealing Himself to men. Which He thankfully is very much in the habit of doing. For thousands of years He spoke to His people and prophets and the biggest thing by far in His revealing of Himself to us was sending Jesus to earth an to the cross. (See Hebrews1:1-3) No longer did God just speak through His prophets, but humbled Himself to be found in human form and share everything with us. He came was tempted and tried and showed His character and wisdom and power to all. "Whoever has seen me has seen the Father" (John14:9).
So although knowing God relies fully on how much He reveals, He has actually gone to every measure to show Himself through creation, through His prophets, and even came to live among us, even now by the Holy Spirit in us who we can walk with each day as we get to know Him more.
But what is knowing God and how?
-To be continued-
Jokes. Lol. Just cliffhanged you.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
7.7.14
John 17:15-16
Yo, today I was going to be going to a Chinese school and helping out with promoting the Vacation Bible School (VBS) that will happen at the end of August at OCBC, but right after my first alarm went off (let's just say I snooze a lot) my boss called and wanted me to work for a few hours. 'Produce emergency'. lol. I am not very productive in the first few hours after I wake up, so work is kinda slow then. haha Ended my shift with packaging cookies. (y)
After work I went home and didn't do all that much while I had lunch, answered some emails, whatever. My brother came home and we went to play tennis, but the courts were locked. After I went to school for the prayer meeting which was sweet.
Anyways, the main point of this post is this continuing struggle with the concept presented in John 17:15-16 where Jesus is praying for his disciples then and to come praying that they not be taken out of the world, but be protected from the evil one and he continues to say that they do not belong to the world. All of this which as been boiled down to "Christians should be in the world, but not of the world". How do you do that?
I come back to this question a lot more when I consider one of my friends. He definitely has a heart for God, and discipleship, and missions, and sharing Jesus with those who normally people don't, but he also ends up in many situations where I begin casting judgement on him.
Now, the issue is where is the balance, to being in the world, but not of it? How can you participate in the world's events while at the same time not agreeing with worldliness? Because there are two ways to do this wrong: to take yourself out of the world, and to be so much in the world that you start to belong to it. The examples that come to mind are that of a monk, secluded and separating himself from the world as much as possible so he can better know and understand the greatness of God and fellowship with him; and maybe 'Christian hipster culture' that almost waters down the gospel to fit in.
Because I see the benefits of both, but to both extremes you lose out on what God was saying. We are to be in the world: there is no other way to share with others and witness what God has done. We are to not be of this world: to be consecrated wholly to God and to stand out in a crowd because of God in our lives helping us to reject sinful or destructive actions / habits.
So, I think I may be too quick to judge my friend based on the outward appearance, but I pray that his heart is in the right place and that I'd be able to encourage and support him through these things rather than sitting and judging him as he attempts to reach others with the good news that Christ died for them.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
After work I went home and didn't do all that much while I had lunch, answered some emails, whatever. My brother came home and we went to play tennis, but the courts were locked. After I went to school for the prayer meeting which was sweet.
Anyways, the main point of this post is this continuing struggle with the concept presented in John 17:15-16 where Jesus is praying for his disciples then and to come praying that they not be taken out of the world, but be protected from the evil one and he continues to say that they do not belong to the world. All of this which as been boiled down to "Christians should be in the world, but not of the world". How do you do that?
I come back to this question a lot more when I consider one of my friends. He definitely has a heart for God, and discipleship, and missions, and sharing Jesus with those who normally people don't, but he also ends up in many situations where I begin casting judgement on him.
Now, the issue is where is the balance, to being in the world, but not of it? How can you participate in the world's events while at the same time not agreeing with worldliness? Because there are two ways to do this wrong: to take yourself out of the world, and to be so much in the world that you start to belong to it. The examples that come to mind are that of a monk, secluded and separating himself from the world as much as possible so he can better know and understand the greatness of God and fellowship with him; and maybe 'Christian hipster culture' that almost waters down the gospel to fit in.
Because I see the benefits of both, but to both extremes you lose out on what God was saying. We are to be in the world: there is no other way to share with others and witness what God has done. We are to not be of this world: to be consecrated wholly to God and to stand out in a crowd because of God in our lives helping us to reject sinful or destructive actions / habits.
So, I think I may be too quick to judge my friend based on the outward appearance, but I pray that his heart is in the right place and that I'd be able to encourage and support him through these things rather than sitting and judging him as he attempts to reach others with the good news that Christ died for them.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
5.7.14
3 Things
Hey,
I'm really not being productive with much these days. Today I snoozed 5 times until I had to go to work without breakfast or a shower or anything.... haha. Needless to say I was kinda braindead at work. haha.
This afternoon was fun though. I got to skype with my buddy BL who, oddly enough, I think is one of my better friends, but I'm pretty sure we haven't spent more than like 10 minutes in a row together in the last 3 years and even then I barely knew him. haha. We pretty much just played hotseat for two hours. lol. Basically asking each other questions back and forth about any and everything. I'm pretty excited for him because he's going to be going to East Asia for about a year starting in August. xP
Later I got to play softball again. xP. This week we actually had like 20 people there. I only got to bat 3 times during the game. I think I should not be on 2nd base. I did very poorly with those grounders. > . > After the game we had Bible time from Philipians2:1-10 and then we played a mini game for fun by splitting into two groups. A couple of the OCBC youth and a couple girls that maybe were just at the park ended up playing part of that mini game. xP It was lots of fun and GC is also pretty good despite not having played in a very long time. xP
I should sleep. xP. I've got worship team practice at 11. Preparing for worship team was good as always. Singing songs of worship is always a great way for me to connect with God.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
PS. Maybe I will be going somewhere for a VBS after all! =D Maybe.
I'm really not being productive with much these days. Today I snoozed 5 times until I had to go to work without breakfast or a shower or anything.... haha. Needless to say I was kinda braindead at work. haha.
This afternoon was fun though. I got to skype with my buddy BL who, oddly enough, I think is one of my better friends, but I'm pretty sure we haven't spent more than like 10 minutes in a row together in the last 3 years and even then I barely knew him. haha. We pretty much just played hotseat for two hours. lol. Basically asking each other questions back and forth about any and everything. I'm pretty excited for him because he's going to be going to East Asia for about a year starting in August. xP
Later I got to play softball again. xP. This week we actually had like 20 people there. I only got to bat 3 times during the game. I think I should not be on 2nd base. I did very poorly with those grounders. > . > After the game we had Bible time from Philipians2:1-10 and then we played a mini game for fun by splitting into two groups. A couple of the OCBC youth and a couple girls that maybe were just at the park ended up playing part of that mini game. xP It was lots of fun and GC is also pretty good despite not having played in a very long time. xP
I should sleep. xP. I've got worship team practice at 11. Preparing for worship team was good as always. Singing songs of worship is always a great way for me to connect with God.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
PS. Maybe I will be going somewhere for a VBS after all! =D Maybe.
1.7.14
Thunder and Lightning High Above
I don't know if it's just me or not, but my favourite part of going to watch fireworks isn't the fire (the lights and sight), but feeling the sound burst and boom when it hits your body with the heavy bass resonating in your abdoman.
To feel that might and power.
While watching the fireworks and crowds today (it's Canada Day btw) the thought crossed my mind of how much more worthy of worship and so much more mighty and powerful is God.
We (the general average person in Ottawa) come to Parliament Hill twice a year: Canada Day and Winterlude. Both times, with numerous friends and tens of thousands of strangers, we all come just to see and feel the resounding majesty of sundry explosions high over the river.
But then it's gone.
The crowds go back to their golden calves and worship what else they will. The one singular united crowd worshiping in awe of sparkling pyrotechnics becomes once again the disjointed and distant tens of thousands of individuals each seeking their own paths to success and fulfillment.
Oh, that we would all turn aside as quickly from these other vices and things that, although less majestic, last slightly longer, and promise more, still fall far short of true satisfaction; these things which distort small beauties into idols which draw our gaze from the true beauty of grace in the cross!
Myself included.
May I see again and again the far greater majesty of God's grace and abundant eternal life purchased through Jesus' sacrifice and completed through the Spirit's work to daily mortify the body.
May we come to worship in Spirit and truth.
D.Fa
To Lead is to Serve
Yo,
One thing I was thinking about a lot today while I was at work (my third shift. xP 3 more this week. I got to meet, or I guess re-meet, one of the new produce guys who used to work pushing carts) was this idea of leadership as a supportive role. One thing I have mentioned many times before was the thought that I'm really not a leader, but prefer the behind the scenes supportive roles. This summer I was challenged as to how my roles, which I though of so little as being part of 'leadership' were actually very much beneficial to the guys I was leading and that qualities such as empathy, delegation, overseeing, shepherding, encouragement, time management, organization, team planning, mentoring, and others, although not the typical image of leadership where the most important guy just kinda does what he thinks is best and everyone follows in his wake, are all great characteristics of leaders.
So, in my next year where I have been given (and have accepted humbly) the role of key student leader at Carleton P2C-S, which although I foresaw me eventually getting into this position, I never thought I would be qualified. My image of a leader was not the idea I would in any way want: the center of attention, making huge decisions for the group, and essentially being the one driving the ministry with others just following what I say. However, seeing the position as one in which I am to serve all the others and really oversee the ministry so that it can really be owned by each of the students involved; that is something I am so excited about!
This summer I have a number of things to prepare for and pray for so that I can be sure we have really put our best effort into the work at hand and not just naively praying without doing anything: I want to put that faith into action and do all we can!
The main point of the second thought is this: I am not a lone leader doing things by myself for myself; I am a dispensable temporary leader whose main role is to encourage and equip others to the ministry that God is calling them to and to build up future leaders. My role is to serve the others and make God (in our lives as well as in our focuses) increase as we decrease and allow Him to be the true leader. Is our mission one of men or of God? Are we continuing by the flesh where we had started and had been called by the Spirit? If that were the case we would fail miserably and be utterly foolish. May God continue to be the focus and true leader of our ministry!
Word.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
One thing I was thinking about a lot today while I was at work (my third shift. xP 3 more this week. I got to meet, or I guess re-meet, one of the new produce guys who used to work pushing carts) was this idea of leadership as a supportive role. One thing I have mentioned many times before was the thought that I'm really not a leader, but prefer the behind the scenes supportive roles. This summer I was challenged as to how my roles, which I though of so little as being part of 'leadership' were actually very much beneficial to the guys I was leading and that qualities such as empathy, delegation, overseeing, shepherding, encouragement, time management, organization, team planning, mentoring, and others, although not the typical image of leadership where the most important guy just kinda does what he thinks is best and everyone follows in his wake, are all great characteristics of leaders.
So, in my next year where I have been given (and have accepted humbly) the role of key student leader at Carleton P2C-S, which although I foresaw me eventually getting into this position, I never thought I would be qualified. My image of a leader was not the idea I would in any way want: the center of attention, making huge decisions for the group, and essentially being the one driving the ministry with others just following what I say. However, seeing the position as one in which I am to serve all the others and really oversee the ministry so that it can really be owned by each of the students involved; that is something I am so excited about!
This summer I have a number of things to prepare for and pray for so that I can be sure we have really put our best effort into the work at hand and not just naively praying without doing anything: I want to put that faith into action and do all we can!
The main point of the second thought is this: I am not a lone leader doing things by myself for myself; I am a dispensable temporary leader whose main role is to encourage and equip others to the ministry that God is calling them to and to build up future leaders. My role is to serve the others and make God (in our lives as well as in our focuses) increase as we decrease and allow Him to be the true leader. Is our mission one of men or of God? Are we continuing by the flesh where we had started and had been called by the Spirit? If that were the case we would fail miserably and be utterly foolish. May God continue to be the focus and true leader of our ministry!
Word.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
28.6.14
A Job Well Done
Yo.
Today I got to work at the grocery store for the first time again in nearly a year and a half. Legit nothing has changed. haha. And like, actually, the staff in Produce have not changed at all except for one guy they just hired a couple weeks ago who I haven't met yet. Otherwise it's all back to the norm.
I'm kinda actually treating my time at work as a workout. This comes back to the philosophy of a housemate I once had who believed that the way North Americans pay a gym 25-45+ dollars each month to go and push around heavy gym equipment is so much worse than the way it used to be where you were paid to push around heavy things as a living (or whatever other jobs were physically exerting). Instead of making money by putting our bodies to use, we pay others to let us sweat semi-publically.
So, getting paid to lift and move 40lb boxes of produce for 4-8 hours a day, in addition to all the other associated physical aspects of the job, is actually very much a benefit of this job compared to others.
I also have been thinking a lot about about a job interview I had last summer over skype. This was with the chemical waste company, where the guy pretty much spoke for 40 minutes trying to convince me why the job would be great. The biggest selling point for me was definitely the fact that, unlike a large number of government or research jobs, there are results at the end of the day and physical things that you accomplish.
When I go home at night and see the produce cooler 3/4s more empty than when I got there I feel some sort of accomplishment. When I look over the tables and see stacks of well organized, delicious produce that is all appealing to the eyes and good for food, I feel accomplished.
Hmm. I can rest. Knowing I have done my job well, I can rest. [more on that later? xP]
Oh. I also got to meet the 'new guy' in Salad Bar (nearly a year is hardly 'new'). Seems like a cool guy. I look forward to getting to know him more.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
PS. Today we played softball. It was great! I'll probably talk about softball some other Friday. xP
Today I got to work at the grocery store for the first time again in nearly a year and a half. Legit nothing has changed. haha. And like, actually, the staff in Produce have not changed at all except for one guy they just hired a couple weeks ago who I haven't met yet. Otherwise it's all back to the norm.
I'm kinda actually treating my time at work as a workout. This comes back to the philosophy of a housemate I once had who believed that the way North Americans pay a gym 25-45+ dollars each month to go and push around heavy gym equipment is so much worse than the way it used to be where you were paid to push around heavy things as a living (or whatever other jobs were physically exerting). Instead of making money by putting our bodies to use, we pay others to let us sweat semi-publically.
So, getting paid to lift and move 40lb boxes of produce for 4-8 hours a day, in addition to all the other associated physical aspects of the job, is actually very much a benefit of this job compared to others.
I also have been thinking a lot about about a job interview I had last summer over skype. This was with the chemical waste company, where the guy pretty much spoke for 40 minutes trying to convince me why the job would be great. The biggest selling point for me was definitely the fact that, unlike a large number of government or research jobs, there are results at the end of the day and physical things that you accomplish.
When I go home at night and see the produce cooler 3/4s more empty than when I got there I feel some sort of accomplishment. When I look over the tables and see stacks of well organized, delicious produce that is all appealing to the eyes and good for food, I feel accomplished.
Hmm. I can rest. Knowing I have done my job well, I can rest. [more on that later? xP]
Oh. I also got to meet the 'new guy' in Salad Bar (nearly a year is hardly 'new'). Seems like a cool guy. I look forward to getting to know him more.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
PS. Today we played softball. It was great! I'll probably talk about softball some other Friday. xP
26.6.14
Working Once Again
Hey guys! I just moved back into my parents' house for the first time in a while and I'll be here for the summer. I hope I can blog more regularly for the time being.
I had intended to put up a post the first day after I moved in. The reason I haven't? Anime. Flash Tower Defense Games. Youtube. Facebook. Sleeping in (a little). But overall: the internet? So, I'm gonna seriously try to not waste so much time on the internet. In a day these will be the maximums: 2 episodes of anime; 5 youtube videos; 1 hour of games; 15 minutes on facebook at a time with at least 30 minutes in between.
I'm almost at the point that I'd like to just not use my computer at all, but my to do list is mostly related to the computer. > . >
This is one reason why I am really looking forward to work tomorrow. The day after I moved in I went to the grocery store to talk to my boss so I could work 10-15 hours a week or something for the rest of the summer so I can pay rent in the fall/winter. He almost gave me a project manager position. I wouldn't have said no. Long story short, that position won't be available until the fall, so I'll be in produce / salad bar again for 10-15+ hours a week over the summer depending on shift availability and others on summer vacation. Cool.
I also emailed my prof about starting my honours research thesis during the summer. We talked on Tuesday and there's this super cool project involving E.coli and Health Canada. So, I'm gonna read over the papers she gave me and get back to her about that. It sounds great though.
There are so many trees that have been chopped down in my neighborhood that it almost doesn't feel like home.
I had a 12ish year old girl get down on one knee and propose that I be her best friend. I would need to put on the rubber band bracelet she was presenting to accept. I declined encouraging her to find a more appropriate best friend since I probably don't understand her very well / I would probably be a bit negligent in our friendship considering I kinda don't have the time for that friendship at the moment.
Anyways, tomorrow is my first day at work. I look forward to actual manual labour for the first time in a year and a half. Should be the same as always, which after a year of co-op will be refreshing. I seriously need a break from spending 7+ hours a day staring at a computer screen.
Yep. haha. I'm actually really grateful for all these opportunities. I need to remember to thank God for them more often.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
I had intended to put up a post the first day after I moved in. The reason I haven't? Anime. Flash Tower Defense Games. Youtube. Facebook. Sleeping in (a little). But overall: the internet? So, I'm gonna seriously try to not waste so much time on the internet. In a day these will be the maximums: 2 episodes of anime; 5 youtube videos; 1 hour of games; 15 minutes on facebook at a time with at least 30 minutes in between.
I'm almost at the point that I'd like to just not use my computer at all, but my to do list is mostly related to the computer. > . >
This is one reason why I am really looking forward to work tomorrow. The day after I moved in I went to the grocery store to talk to my boss so I could work 10-15 hours a week or something for the rest of the summer so I can pay rent in the fall/winter. He almost gave me a project manager position. I wouldn't have said no. Long story short, that position won't be available until the fall, so I'll be in produce / salad bar again for 10-15+ hours a week over the summer depending on shift availability and others on summer vacation. Cool.
I also emailed my prof about starting my honours research thesis during the summer. We talked on Tuesday and there's this super cool project involving E.coli and Health Canada. So, I'm gonna read over the papers she gave me and get back to her about that. It sounds great though.
There are so many trees that have been chopped down in my neighborhood that it almost doesn't feel like home.
I had a 12ish year old girl get down on one knee and propose that I be her best friend. I would need to put on the rubber band bracelet she was presenting to accept. I declined encouraging her to find a more appropriate best friend since I probably don't understand her very well / I would probably be a bit negligent in our friendship considering I kinda don't have the time for that friendship at the moment.
Anyways, tomorrow is my first day at work. I look forward to actual manual labour for the first time in a year and a half. Should be the same as always, which after a year of co-op will be refreshing. I seriously need a break from spending 7+ hours a day staring at a computer screen.
Yep. haha. I'm actually really grateful for all these opportunities. I need to remember to thank God for them more often.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
29.4.14
How Can I Keep From Singing?
Not like I really need to tell you, but I will be going on a short hiatus. haha
I don't know exactly what I want to say at this point. It's been a bit of a tough semester again and a struggle all the same, but God has definitely also been encouraging me through it. Recently the song above really encouraged me. Although there are tough times, I know God's grace is the reason I am where I am now and there's so much ahead. I am His now and always. He has done so much for me and I do want to tell others more and more.
The following song also really spoke to me. haha
http://youtu.be/ya5lpGxMB30
Anyways, ttyl. Co-op was awesome. I should have talked more about that. lol And adopt a family / adopt a student program. And so many other things. lol
D.Fa
I don't know exactly what I want to say at this point. It's been a bit of a tough semester again and a struggle all the same, but God has definitely also been encouraging me through it. Recently the song above really encouraged me. Although there are tough times, I know God's grace is the reason I am where I am now and there's so much ahead. I am His now and always. He has done so much for me and I do want to tell others more and more.
The following song also really spoke to me. haha
http://youtu.be/ya5lpGxMB30
Anyways, ttyl. Co-op was awesome. I should have talked more about that. lol And adopt a family / adopt a student program. And so many other things. lol
D.Fa
6.4.14
All I Have Is Christ
Today I was reflecting on just the phrase "all I have is Christ" and typically a phrase like that (with anything other than Christ) would have negative connotations like, I have nothing, but ____, which would usually not be much.
But in this case, having Christ, to know and be united in Christ, to have eternal life and be found in Him, to have your name in the book of life, to be called His friend and son, to have Christ means so much that parabolically when you find it you'd go and willingly sell everything you have.
But in this case, having Christ, to know and be united in Christ, to have eternal life and be found in Him, to have your name in the book of life, to be called His friend and son, to have Christ means so much that parabolically when you find it you'd go and willingly sell everything you have.
Sitting at the
otrain stop facing financial 'difficulty' in the next year, practically starving, exhausted from this
life and burning out rapidly,
I have Christ.
Who cares about he rest of that?
I have Christ, but more so, God has me in His hands and won't let me go.
this week I've felt so humbled
Monday as I was leaving work I tripped on the stairs and like smashed my head into the super hard staircase
I have Christ.
Who cares about he rest of that?
I have Christ, but more so, God has me in His hands and won't let me go.
this week I've felt so humbled
last Sunday I felt like crap and just hated everything and said a lot of garbage to a friend without thinking it through. So I stopped everything and just went and prayed. Probably the best quiet time I'd had all year.
I know God loves me.
I know God loves me.
Monday as I was leaving work I tripped on the stairs and like smashed my head into the super hard staircase
my neck still hurts,through
all of the translation and lunch overseeing I felt so helpless havign
no ability to actually do things, but being fully reliant on what
everyone else was doing.
Having
my friend leave halfway through thursday when I had planned to spend
all day with her and share the gospel hopefully, and instead I was now
alone at the dinner, which is the thing I wanted to avoid.
having to go to work on Friday morning with like no sleep.
I have nothing
but Christ
and it's really humbling
but I know I have Christ
All I have is Christ, and that is enough.
All I have is Christ, and that is enough.
31.3.14
To Preach to Yourself
When I lead worship, I choose songs that preach to me.
Have I been choosing songs of legalism? Preaching our need to recommit to God? Rather than that of grace fully undeserved and magnificently amazing?
Lord, I need the gospel. I need forgiveness for thinking I could ever do anything to earn salvation. I need forgiveness if my words or actions have conveyed a similar message to anyone. I need your Spirit to speak to my heart a true repentance, a knowledge of your grace, and a humbleness to know it is more than I could comprehend.
D.Fa
Have I been choosing songs of legalism? Preaching our need to recommit to God? Rather than that of grace fully undeserved and magnificently amazing?
Lord, I need the gospel. I need forgiveness for thinking I could ever do anything to earn salvation. I need forgiveness if my words or actions have conveyed a similar message to anyone. I need your Spirit to speak to my heart a true repentance, a knowledge of your grace, and a humbleness to know it is more than I could comprehend.
D.Fa
30.3.14
Thoughts
This semester our DG has been memorizing 1Cor13. Near the end 'now we see in a mirror dimly, then face to face. For now we know in part, but then I shall know fully even as I am fully known.'
These words are very profound. There's no way we can know God fully now, but He knows us fully now. Fully and intimately, He knows us and still would choose to show His love for us through the cross, once and for all paying the price that animals never could.
Even though I am going through some stuff now, God is still loving; patiently and kindly, not insisting but bearing all things. Love never ends. This present suffering is not worth comparing to the future glory.
Also, those who have been adopted are sealed with the Holy Spirit, as a guarentee of things to come. If I have experienced His work in me (which I definitely have) then I know He loves me.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
5.3.14
Twitch
So, I don't know how nerdy you are. If you are even a tad nerdy, like in a video game kinda way, and have some idea of what is happening on the internets or a little bit into pokémon, you probably know that there's this thing called 'twitch' and thousands of people around the world are playing the same game of pokémon!
They successfully beat pokémon red version together and are now trying pokémon crystal. I played for a little bit yesterday, but I was a little annoyed. I was asking 'how do we ever get things done??' and if I didn't explain this it'd be confusing. So, there is one game and /everyone/ i controlling it. There are two modes 'anarchy' and 'democracy'. In 'anarchy' literally every input is completed, leading to . . . anarchy. lol. This is mostly because there are people trying to be counter-productive. In democracy mode every 15-45 seconds the game will take a poll for what the next move(s) should be. However, if it is a tie the poll starts over. So, there can often be many ties and nothing happening, especially since it is hard with the lag to input the same multi-move command. So either way, if there are a number of people controlling it, with varying opinions, the results are less than optimal.
I was thinking about this briefly:
Life is like "TwitchPlaysPokemon".
I mean that in that, there is a reason, a purpose, or at the very least goals for your life. However, it gets difficult to accomplish these things when there are so many people trying to have input into what you do. In addition to what you think you should do are friends and family. With just them you may be better off. However, there are also the trolls and those who want to hurt you, make you fail, disorient you.
This becomes even more severe when you realize the multitude of people and the messages in the world that are trying to persuade you this way or that. How could you ever follow a single path when what is cool is constantly changing, when the culture tells you to pursue one thing when your family, friends, and God tell you otherwise?
I have also thought extensively about what 'Frozen' is really saying, but that is for later.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
They successfully beat pokémon red version together and are now trying pokémon crystal. I played for a little bit yesterday, but I was a little annoyed. I was asking 'how do we ever get things done??' and if I didn't explain this it'd be confusing. So, there is one game and /everyone/ i controlling it. There are two modes 'anarchy' and 'democracy'. In 'anarchy' literally every input is completed, leading to . . . anarchy. lol. This is mostly because there are people trying to be counter-productive. In democracy mode every 15-45 seconds the game will take a poll for what the next move(s) should be. However, if it is a tie the poll starts over. So, there can often be many ties and nothing happening, especially since it is hard with the lag to input the same multi-move command. So either way, if there are a number of people controlling it, with varying opinions, the results are less than optimal.
I was thinking about this briefly:
Life is like "TwitchPlaysPokemon".
I mean that in that, there is a reason, a purpose, or at the very least goals for your life. However, it gets difficult to accomplish these things when there are so many people trying to have input into what you do. In addition to what you think you should do are friends and family. With just them you may be better off. However, there are also the trolls and those who want to hurt you, make you fail, disorient you.
This becomes even more severe when you realize the multitude of people and the messages in the world that are trying to persuade you this way or that. How could you ever follow a single path when what is cool is constantly changing, when the culture tells you to pursue one thing when your family, friends, and God tell you otherwise?
I have also thought extensively about what 'Frozen' is really saying, but that is for later.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
1.3.14
Serious Thoughts
Yo.
(pause and think about what happened yesterday that I wanted to blog about)
!!!
YO!
So yesterday was DG day and everything, which was good. We've been memorizing 1Cor13, and it's been really good, like so good I'm like 7 verses ahead just because. lol. (much better than a verse behind like last semester. . . lol.) And after was time with MT which is always good. haha
After I ended up in the Architecture studio as normal, but then I got a text from MM asking what I was doing. Apparently AG's landlady was meeting up with them and JF, so I should go too. lol So I went. haha. Really excited about the possibility of living there next year. Really chill landlady, super cool bros, awesome house. But I don't know if I should be there with them, which I reeeeeally want, or back with my parents, which could be good, but may also be difficult in many ways... Hmmmm... But it sounds like it'd be so awesome. Gotta pray more about it.
------
One thought I got this week is about responsibility and how seriously I take it. I typically say yes to everything and then don't really take anything seriously until the day before. Everything is stretched and beyond it's limits. But when I think about how great things could be, and then someone challenges me to do it, I'm so pumped and behind it to the point that everything else dies down. But what am I now? Do I have any serious responsibilities already? How about being an ambassador? What about ambassador for the King?? Ambassador for God..?
Why don't I take that more seriously?
Hmmmm.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
(pause and think about what happened yesterday that I wanted to blog about)
!!!
YO!
So yesterday was DG day and everything, which was good. We've been memorizing 1Cor13, and it's been really good, like so good I'm like 7 verses ahead just because. lol. (much better than a verse behind like last semester. . . lol.) And after was time with MT which is always good. haha
After I ended up in the Architecture studio as normal, but then I got a text from MM asking what I was doing. Apparently AG's landlady was meeting up with them and JF, so I should go too. lol So I went. haha. Really excited about the possibility of living there next year. Really chill landlady, super cool bros, awesome house. But I don't know if I should be there with them, which I reeeeeally want, or back with my parents, which could be good, but may also be difficult in many ways... Hmmmm... But it sounds like it'd be so awesome. Gotta pray more about it.
------
One thought I got this week is about responsibility and how seriously I take it. I typically say yes to everything and then don't really take anything seriously until the day before. Everything is stretched and beyond it's limits. But when I think about how great things could be, and then someone challenges me to do it, I'm so pumped and behind it to the point that everything else dies down. But what am I now? Do I have any serious responsibilities already? How about being an ambassador? What about ambassador for the King?? Ambassador for God..?
Why don't I take that more seriously?
Hmmmm.
Ttyl.
D.Fa
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