Grade 12

Grade 12 was interesting. I think it was the most dramatic year of high school. lol.

< Warning, I may ramble extensively >

So, I had been up and down in my faith the last couple years and was still trying to figure out what it meant to me. Our pastor at some point said that he had a friend who went to church with his girlfriend, but the second they broke up he stopped going. Was I going because of her? That was a question I didn't want to let go by without trying to figure it out. So I think the summer before grade 12 she was gone doing ministry so I had time to think without her. I don't remember what I came to exactly. lol.

Grade 12 we pretty much did everything together. Honestly. I guess our classes started to differ, since I continued in sciences only and she only did Bio, but we were still all in the same bands (all of them) and hung out in the music basement at lunch, and went to youth group and church together, now we played on worship team together. I pretty much thought she was my girlfriend, well I knew she wasn't, but I wasn't going to change anything. I was too shy to just tel her I liked her, but I pretty much treated her as a girlfriend, of course there were obvious boundaries since we weren't though.

I tried out for the volleyball team, auditioned for the fall production, and was in Jazz Band. These all conflicted a lot. Jazz was an actual credit course now though, but if I didn't go to practice I wasn't allowed to play volleyball during the games. I had told my boss I would be very busy with the play because my friends said they had a big role for me. SW got it instead and I was probably about 1/10th of a role. lol... So I missed rehearsals a lot. I had three lines. But the times I did go were awesome! Some days our improv games were the most ridiculous amazing things in the world. From volleyball practices we had to do a lot of punishment, like serve practicing if you missed you had to do like 10 crunches or something, if your team lost the mini-match against the other half of the team you had to grab the towel-wrapped boards and clean the gym's floor back and forth (I was really bad at this until I finally understood how to do it). I was so close to having abs. lol. Jazz was always fun. We had a small band and I was lead trombone, so I actually had to play really high notes and be responsible for playing them well instead of hiding under NM as we all used to do (Rolling Thunder *cough*)

And then it turned out that all three had big things happening at the same time. Feeder band tour, OFSAA, and the performance were all within a couple days. I nearly made the decision to drop out of the play and go with the team to OFSAA (in a different city), but at a game later in the day after the tour (in Ottawa) we didn't win and so we didn't go to OFSAA. Oh well.

I think this was the year CR got serious about us memorizing music for Dixie band? Nah. He always did that for JazzFest, but I guess it was the year we had 'new music'. >.> Can't we just play "I Know What it MEans to Miss New Orleans" and "5'2" Eyes of Blue"? lol...

Now this is embarassing . . . >.> 24hr Music-a-thon. I didn't really sleep. I had pop-tarts. loll. I ended up passing out during a performance and one of my steel drums fell over making a huge deal (it was all streamed online live to make it worse. loll). >.> There was a mini praise concert from like 3-4 am. I don't understand this whole situation even now, but before AL went on stage we practiced together Italian run and then she went on alone and it may have been really awkward for me to sing from the audience. lol... / TS yelling 'Yeah! Jesus music!' or something like that. >.>. There was no Jazz Buffet that year.

Um. lol.

So, I went on a trip to Montreal for the third time I think? It was cool as always, but on the bus I texted (I had a phone now? When did I get my first one? Idk, but I had broken my new one in September and now have the one I had then) my buddy RL and told him a secret of the girl I liked.

She was not happy about this. Although it was also not important. It was about a band RL really liked that she would never admit openly that she liked. She said something along the lines of not being able to trust me.

It was winter.

Back in school in January and she has a boyfriend.

Even colder.

They had been dating for a little while now. I had no idea. She didn't tell me.

So now I had to deal with getting over my not-real-girlfriend breaking up with me by cheating on a guy who was also in everything we both were, and then dealing with not hating him as I ended up wanting to for liking the same girl as me and then dating her for the second time. >.>

So there was a whole lot of tension there for a couple months. They were way too close for my comfort, but if I hadn't said anything I can't blame them.

*sigh*

I definitely knew I wasn't in church for her by this point. Instead of ditching the church, I turned closer to God. My real relationship with God was worth far more than my non-existant relationship with her.

Also that year was the Musical "Once Upon a Mattress" which is not a tragedy in anyway. Our drama teacher left for the fancy new school in Barrhaven. >.< I was almost offered a role as the mute King, but I wrote on my application that I did not want to be him since he couldn't sing. lol. So I ended up as Knight 3 after the originally cast person dropped out. Again this was awesome. I got to know NJ pretty well. I really admired her singing since her role in Urinetown, but now we were dance partners. The musical was awesome and we were back on stage at NAC, well, not all of us this time. We (collective) won a lot of awards and JC accepted one in a tiger costume. lol.

I was definitely committed to my faith and when God told me I needed to talk to BC about Him I did not want to. I ended up inviting him to Engage Your World (was that what it was called?) and got a little obsessed with Manic Drive. lol. I ended up asking a lot of my friends to go, but I never shared the gospel.

This year No Other Name was cool. This was the year I found out that there were Christians at MHS. lol KC, RM, MR, IP, HC, to name a few.

This was also the year that DS passed away. He got in a car accident, he wasn't driving, and it wasn't the driver's fault, it was the other car. This threw the whole school into a loop for a week or two. Students were gathered outside his locker with many pictures and tissues for days on end. Honestly, I didn't know him that well, but I was really shook up too. I skipped Physics class to go to the wake. We all walked from school to his church for the funeral service. In both places his family was not grieving, but full of hope. DS may not have said much out loud of his faith, but was firm and knew Christ as his saviour. When we left the service the sun poked through the clouds. I left work early to go to his youth group too.

I haven't even mentioned spares. lol. Cramming with AP every day. lol.

English class. lol. JS is the most hilarious teacher in existence. Ephemeral. Cakes. SC. I didn't read Hamlet. I focused on studying Gatsby symbolism for the exam and got the exact prompt we had all studied for.

I tried out for the baseball team between rehearsals for OUaM. SF.

Gotcha! I was so upset when MT tagged me! I was asking the refs a question about rules because my guy was sick. // I had backstabbed and betrayed so many people. I was going to win for sure. I knew everyone in the school (practically) and they all trusted me. >.<

I applied for Carleton last second. lol. I didn't really want to go to University.

Oh. Summer school with AP and BC / the CB IB kids. lol. Big 2.

Ummmm. I pretty much walked around like I owned the place. lol.

MM! I compleely forgot to mention him in Grade 11! I meant to. I met him in Japanese class! and then he ended up at my school!

Ummm. Oh, Musical rehearsals were on Saturdays in April so I couldn't go to Getaway (OCYM retreat), but KC our stage manager did! >.< Met JS.

lol.... Secret tennis match with my brother's girlfriend? lolllllllll

30 hour famine amazing race / all-star band (I missed my chance to talk about one day without shoes for grade 11. darn. NO! It was this year!!) / One day without shoes. lol. So, I don't care for shoes. So when I hear about this day to raise awareness for people who don't have shoes and this causes serious health problems and makes life difficult, ok, let's do this! So I swear to not wear shoes all day, but just in case, I brought them in my bag. All-Star band rehearsal was at a school like a 20min bus away or something and it is raining now. I wait at the stop by my house with my trombone and no shoes. Get on. He says, no shoes, no service. I say "I have them in my bag". He says, but you weren't wearing them before you got on. So he kicks me off barefoot into the mud puddle and I have to get to practice ASAP. So, I run. lol. When I get there people are like O.o?!!?!? LOL! Cause I am soaked through, muddy legs, with a trombone and no shoes, and a couple minutes late. lol. My music was slightly wet.

Ummm. I'll just stop here. But ya, so much of my time in school was not about school. lol. It's the people and stuff that happens that really counted.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Grade 11

I feel like I don't remember much of the end of highschool. oh well.

< Untimed flashback alert. May be long and boring  >

I know this much, I auditioned for the musical. This year was Urinetown. In the audition I could not sing Bobby Strong's part, it was a note too high. I ended up cast in a somewhat major role as Officer Barrel. However, this meant I missed out on a lot of the singing since I could not just be in the crowds, and the Police Song was more of a rap. This is where my famous laugh was derived. As an evil cop I was required to laugh with evil intent multiple times and since this has become normal. I don't think I ever liked my laugh before this point. I rather enjoy the attention I receive now. lol. Officer Barrel kinda had this thing for Officer Lockstock. I didn't like that about the role, but had to deal with it. It wasn't a huge point in the script, but I guess it determined a lot of what my character was willing to do. This show was a lot of fun. I got to know most of the cast really well and we even got nominated for a Cappie award and performed a scene on stage at the NAC. Cast party singing songs with CN on VB's piano. lol. good times.

What else happened? Oh. I nearly got in a lot of trouble for 'academic dishonesty'. Not my own, but a friend who had borrowed my accounting workbook, and seemed to be copying it. >.>

I think it was this year that vocal jazz started.

Officially in Sr. Jazz band.

This was probably the year that I went to Naru2U with LS and TWH.

Physics class was cool. GG for Bio and Chem. ML for music / SecondCup class. lol. Probably around now I had a mild crush on CC, but she had a boyfriend.

This year I played trumpet at Chinese New Year. And the food was so good. lol.

Was this the year I watched Tengen Toppa Guren Laggen? I think so? Uhhhhhh........

=) I'm pretty sure this was the year I was 30 minutes late to my English exam, yet had the highest English mark I ever got. The substitute teacher was sooooooooooooo much nicer than our original teacher and my mark went up like 15% in like 3 weeks. >.> Just saying.

KC was now at MHS. She dropped IB and was now the source of all things Korean. lol.

No Other Name on Good Friday at the MET. I made a real commitment to trying to follow Christ more and had to tell my boss (got a job the summer before) that I could no longer work on Sunday mornings. Ended up going to service to which CW has told me it was like 'all a sudden there was another white guy!' or something like that. lol.

Definitely the year I told SZ to ask AL about the gospel five-coloured bead bracelet. Lol. I was pretty awkward. lol.

When did I start blogging? I think it was this year. I think.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Grade 10

Yo so, this is kinda a big year, so maybe it will be longer?

< RAMBLE ALERT! this could be long and disjointed >

Grade 10 as far as school goes, was fairly similar. Gifted classes, gym, music, History instead of Geography, and some careers and civics stuff. lol.

I remember very little about Careers. lol. I know me and HB had some sort of "Pancake Party of Canada" in Civics. History class was the best, despite my not liking the subject much. Our teacher was amazing. Always bringing the material to life and getting us into it. We played an extended game of Diplomacy and I remember that night at the Coffeehouse performance bringing a map of Europe to help figure out what my next moves would be. I had studied the rules thoroughly and definitely had a better grasp of the game and the people playing than the others did. I started as England, so I was the only one who really needed to understand boats at the beginning. lol. Another point I was a Tsar with the epaulettes and everything. Later on I was Trudeau with rose and all. But at the end I was alone in the office taking both Accounting and History exams at the same time.

I remember talking to SZ about Maplestory in History class a few times. I think at this point things were ending and I was playing around with different in game professions with newer characters. I think I really did like my archer, but was always far more happy about the cost-efficiency of having a cleric who doesn't need potions to heal. lol.

Ummm. I know this was the first time I auditioned for a play. I auditioned for BatBoy, but was not selected for further auditions or a role. >.< My high school had a long tradition of Tragic Comedy Musicals and despite not liking drama, I liked singing enough to want to be in it. I later ended up in a One Act play about the greek gods? It was slightly confusing. We sang the Prince of Bel Air in gangster getup. lol...

This year I had met a girl a year younger than me. She was also in the One Act. At this time I thought a lot about how there are really more than one facets to who we are. When I am in a gifted class, you very much get the academic D.Fa, stoic, controlled, quieter, has the answers but doesn't show it. But if you meet me in a dramatic context you meet drama D.Fa, who does random things, is mysterious but entertaining, laughs more often. She met drama D.Fa, and I guess I was leading her on because eventually she was like up in my face about me not asking her out on a date yet. If this hadn't happened right before the summer, when she then left to visit family strewn across Ontario, I would have potentially ended up having a girlfriend. But ya, that did happen and all this just faded away. lol.

I don't remember a whole lot of specifics through this year. lol...

But one of the biggest things by far that did happen was my friend AL invited me to her youth group. I remember talking to my mom and she was saying "they are just trying to convert you". What does that even mean / AL wouldn't do that. I don't know. lol. I actually told AL about the conversation I think, or asked her if she was trying to convert me.

I ended up going, we played volleyball, smash brothers, had dinner, I re-met RL whom I hadn't seen in years (he went into IB at CBHS), but I'm pretty sure most of the time I tailed AL. I was a shy kid. lol.

This year I did not go to Chinese New Year. I remember Alpha was cancelled because of it, so I had a week off. Pretty sure this was the year AL was baptised and something happened in History class about it..?

Of Alpha I don't remember all that much. I know I was separated from AL by age-defined grouping. It wasn't just her church, but also a Cambodian church and an Anglican church. MM was my group leader with SB and I was with the older students, SZ, a red haired girl who may have been in a nursing program(?) and a cool Cambodian guy. Our discussion time was usually pretty quiet. lol. MM gave me my first Bible and encouraged me to pray. There was some sort of example of something blocking our relationship with God using like the "Claritan Clear" idea. I know I had mustard covered marshmallows dropped on my face during a sleepover night. lol... I know I went every week and got a free book at the end banquet thing.

I think that's it. lol.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

PS. Playing tennis felt so good today. lol.

Grade 9

And so I entered High school.

< Ramble Alert >

I feel like I won't really be able to distinguish too much from one year to the next. >.>

Ummm. Grade 9 was the first time I was in a gifted class, where there was actually like 20-30 other gifted kids. We went from class to class together. Music and Science and English (there were more in English). ML, RM, SZ, AP, AdSB. New best friends.

English and Geography class was the worst. French was the worst. Presentations every two weeks. >.< Cannot take that much public speaking, or that much French pressure. lol. AL and AdSB made some sort of Scarf video.

Science class. The best. Our teacher was hilarious. I don't really remember why though.

I think this was when I got my first mp3 player. lol. The only songs I had were Japanese anime opening or ending songs. My cousins were over for Christmas? I think? Maybe not.

We went to Halifax on a band trip at the end of the year. I have this thing where I really don't like using toilets that I am not familiar with. I remember I didn't go to the bathroom from Ottawa to Halifax. >.<

Ummmm. I auditioned for the Jr. Jazz band. 'Mack the Knife'? Is that what it was called? I also joined the Dixie band and I think I had to share with E(?) for a little bit then he left and joined the other dixie band or something. I think this was the year we had ND as tuba player for us.

I still had a crush in this girl. But then it ended up that a friend also did, which made me a little angry at him. I think it was this year (or maybe the next? but I think it was this year) that I made a fool of myself and I think I actually did tell her I liked her. I bought her a CD of her favourite artist, and a large stuffed animal. And then it was like, oh, you have a boyfriend... A guy I do not respect. Hmm....

I completely do not remember anything about lunch breaks or gym class.

Oh. I wasn't in the steel band, but really wanted to be so I asked CL to teach me how to play bass guitar so I could join them in the second semester. Lessons were slow. lol..... I feel like I really didn't learn that much, just where the notes were?

This year there was also an Intermediate band led by this awesome Tuba guy. I was asked to join and it was a lot of fun. I really liked playing trombone. Learning the music, overcoming the hard parts, playing in harmony and time with everyone. It was a good feeling. (Maroon band sweaters. loll) AdSB was always a joker though. TS and EA too. We were a good group of trombone players. Was it this year that I took EA's trombone and hid it in a locker and then later got a call from his mom because she asked why he didn't have it to practice when he got home? Maybe. Awkward...

Ttyl.

D.Fa

PS. Swamped in Work Presentation Preparation right now...
PPS. Trinidad and Tobago!

Grade 8

So it continues. I had a thought, maybe these will get awkward when they are more recent? Whatever. I'll leave out more names. lol.

[ Warning! This post may again be a rambler!! ]

So, what do I remember from 8 years ago?

I know my homeroom teacher was very nice and in charge of the student council, but this whole year I wished I was back in my grade 7 classroom. Both the room and the classmates had a different feel, a more home-like feel. This year my class felt like it had just been thrown together and all I could do was miss my friends from last year. I often spent time with them anyways.

I think at one point I had access to a girl's locker in addition to mine, and I got caught once by my teacher from grade 7. >.> But she didn't realize anything.

I think I ended up being friends with AM and JW most. We worked on a debate or something about Newfoundland? I'm pretty sure I cheated (like one or two points) on a History test and slept through multiple historical movies.

The choir was reinstated and I joined and also joined the soloist group. We sang a lot of random stuff. The soloists were also given extra stuff to sing. We each chose a song and practiced it and recorded  it I think? We were apparently supposed to audition for the talent show. I didn't realize / I didn't want to. >.< Sing in front of the whole school? no. lol. We sang karaoke quite a bit. CN was now one of my best friends. He was a little off. He played trumpet and Maplestory. This is how I got into Maplestory. My first three characters all sucked because I thought I should have even distribution of ability points. >.> He became a high-level dragon knight quite quickly.

There was this weird percussion ensemble that was formed. It was interesting, but not that interesting. lol. I'd rather play real instruments.

Music class was good. It was split with this class that only had like 4 guys in it (It was a french immersion class!).

So, jazz band. Pretty sure we went to nationals for Music Fest and I had to play 'Cathy's Army' which went up to an F I think? Adjudicator told me I was doing the vibrato all wrong. >.>

Oh! Math was a lot of fun! We had this older woman teaching us. She was a pretty stern teacher, but that makes it all the more fun. lol.

I did not make a table in Design and Technology class, I took one home. I was a keener in the class and so I was able to make whatever I wanted. I looked in my room and realized I was missing a table. So that's what I'd make. The teacher sold me one that had been half made. lol.

Oh. A girl in my class got contacts. I bugged her for a week or two. I thought she looked better with the glasses. She looked cuter without the glasses actually, I later realized.

Oh! This was when I got to be friends with OD, AS, and BP! I was wondering when that was. Oh. and I actually was student council representative. I made a speech and everything.

I was a little jealous of D(?) because she got to play the bass clarinet. >.< Coolest instrument.

Our grad dance was in a different building. I really liked this one girl and was almost being a complete idiot because of it. I went to get her cake, but didn't know what flavour she wanted so I got both. She already had cake. >.> Rascal Flatts and Gasolina.

Pretty sure I still didn't like dancing. I think it was this year that a rumour that I liked a girl ended up making me like her a bit. I had danced with her, a slow dance, at one of the dances. Most guys made fun of her. She was nice. Hmmmm.... Maybe this part was grade 7?

I don't remember much about this year. We played with lasers in Science I think?

OH! The Hodge Podge! >.< Why I stopped taking art class.

My earliest memory of AT? Donating hair for cancer?

Pretty awkward year.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Grade 7

Hey, I've been thinking about the past a bunch lately, so I'm gonna write down most of my thoughts from each year that I remember starting with Grade 7.

<Warning: These posts will be the definition of rambling>

So, my middle school was across the street. This meant I could sleep in until 5 minutes before class started. At the time I did not shower everyday. Lol... I really liked my teacher. She was young, smart, pretty, and he honestly cared about each of us.

We had to set goals for the semester. I only made ones I knew I could do or had already done. Kinda lame. Haha.

Through the year I think I had crushes on four girls, primarily. K, N, P, and B. At one point, I think it was Christmas, I asked my best friend PM to ask all the girls in our class whether they liked bracelets or necklaces more. That week I braided each of them the one they said they liked more and each had three coloured beads. The colours represented how much I liked them, but I never told them that. Lol.........

This was the first year we got to play real instruments for music class (not just recorders) and I chose the trombone because the guy at the info night said I was really good at it. I joined all the bands and that became my identity for a long time. "number1trombone" was also my email address. I don't remember when I actually got email though. >.> Could have been later. Grade 9 or something?

Our class was actually really close. I don't think I ever had a real conflict with anyone. RL and GN were my newer best friends along with PM who I had already known. We went to Wendy's once. Lol. I don't think I went home for lunch that often, but I may have.

AW is one girl I kinda liked. She was really kind, but also really funny in a weird kinda way. Like, she was extremely athletic, but didn't really know how to harness the potential. She high jumped and landed on the other side of the crash mat once. O.o And she always drew these squirel-like creatures. One time on the side board she drew one with the words "if you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie." Those words have stuck with me. Lol.

Art class with our French teacher. Gym class with our Canadian History teacher. Video games with PM (and my brother sometimes). Trying to get the Integrated Arts teacher to start a choir again with KA.

Things were changing though.

School dances existed. >.> I usually went to the games room and played Magic cards with AM. Lol.

I liked our library. XP. I never really took out books. We still had book reports and presentations and stuff like that.

I don't really remember recesses.

Ha! MC was in my class. She was hilarious! Almost taught me Chinese. But I annoyed her too much so she stopped after a couple days...

Hmmm... Oh. This guy. He showed up one day and was added to our class and claimed he was a millionaire. He tried buying friendship. Like, he didn't actually give us anything though, so we were very skeptical. No one liked him. In gym class we had to.do a choreographed dance. I think the other guys paid him a dollar to just be quiet. ...

Grade 7. Probably a lot more. Lol.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Could be Worse

Hmmmm........ Well this could be bad. haha

So today after work I went to the gym wtih FB. It was time for me to renew my gym membership. They took my card and renewed it and asked "how will you be paying?" I had now realized I didn't have my debit card. Must be in a pocket of my other pants or something. They let me in for today because I said I'd be back tomorrow.

I now, after searching through all of my freshly laundered pants cannot find it. >.>

I haven't used it since Thursday according to my bank account. So that's good at least.

But I have no credit cards and no cash now. And if I need to get a new card mailed to me, that's a week. >.<

So. Can I survive one more month with no money?

That's my first thought.

Probably not a good thought. lol. Probably just have to go to the bank in the mall and explain the situation, cancel my old card, get a new one. Probably.

Can I pay with cheque? I have cheques. lol.........

Ttyl.

D.Fa

PS. God answers prayer.

Heart-Shaped Cookies

I'm going to sleep now. A youtube show I saw about Chinese wives' tales told me I should be sleeping at 11pm. (True story)

Today was cool. I got to watch a sweet testimony of a guy's life from nearly aborted, to drugs and gangs, to nearly put in jail, to leading hundreds of youth to Christ. http://youtu.be/r5rNppShHGk

Anyways, Ttyl.

D.Fa

From the Ice Age

So. I have a bee and a dragonfly in my freezer right now. o.O

I put them there on the advice of my friend. He has a course about insects or something in September so he needs to catch a whole bunch of bugs, so I wanted to help. You have no idea how much I enjoy bug hunting, and I do it by hand. lol. I haven't done it in a long while though. I got a lot of funny looks when I was stalking the dragonfly. And a guy asked if I was ok and if I needed help with anything. lol...

Yesterday was pretty cool. I had lunch with YF and KA. I found out KA is actually from Macao. haha. We talked about a lot of random stuff and I talked about hypocrisy and the question from Alpha. Healing or Forgiveness. It was a good talk. Got to share the gospel too. xP

Don't remember much else. lol.

I've only got 2000 emails left in my inbox. XP. I think I am confusing a lot of people with replies to emails 2 years old. lol.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

TBH: 90 Minutes of Google Ads?

Yo, so today kinda sucked. I stayed up way too late and made bad decisions and lived with it all day. The morning was so unproductive and dull until I read something in a journal article about the Bible. What?!? It said that the fungus probably originated from Middle East and there are early Roman literature references and in the Bible.

Matt6:19-21 "Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

I'm working on RUST! =D 

and boy does it destroy. Even in North America, with resistance genes and controlled reproduction and everything it still destroys 5-25% of the yield. Not as bad as another one which leaves mycotoxins though. >.< 

Anyways, I think this verse has really caught my day. This day was wrecked by yesterday's sins. Laying up satisfaction for myself in the present, on the earth, only to destroy myself, walking into the deep end when I know I can't swim just because the water feels good. But when we trust in God's plans, though we may not see them yet, living by faith not sight, we trust in the future, we trust in eternity, we trust in God's ultimate redemptive plan for the greatest good of all who are made in His image.

I've never had more fun organizing a freezer in my life. lol.

I was still pretty messed after work. I sat down and read. I read all about out heavenly dwelling, the eternal bodies prepared for us after this struggle and battle ends. I read of God's reconciling ourselves to Him through Christ, not counting men's sins against them. I read of joy in hardship. 

PG asked me about it. Apparently he said the exact same words as another friend of mine. "I don't read the Bible very much. I'm not a very good Christian." He says usually he doesn't have time and that he often thinks it is more boring than a novel. These are the words of God, written through the Spirit in the lives of prophets and scribes. This book is amazing.

I sent some facebook messages. Apologized to a brother for sins from a couple years ago. God's got so much planned, why would I ever choose to go against these plans? These plans are light and life for those who follow them.

I biked home so I could be kidnapped. lol. Went to the movies. The Internship was hilarious. I always feel so bad for the asian kid who gets walked all over by family and friends. I feel like I have a lot of friends like this.

Anyways, good times with friends. XP

Gotta keep looking forward.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

But You Want to Drown

Do you ever get it when the words in a song just speak to you so powerfully?

This song kinda captures how I feel about sin when I am failing. Every line of it.

Sink or swim is the question. There may not be dry land until we get to the end, but He said "I'll give you my hand. I'll keep my promise. We can reach the end." I could say "I'm just fine if I just have You by my side." But cold as ice I don't turn back to my friend calling out to me. I know the consequences, but I want to drown.



Water by Andrew Huang (Free Download Here: http://tinyurl.com/ms9lb3z)

Lyrics:

sink or swim again
i'll give you my hand
'til we reach the end
there's never dry land

we'll catch a glimpse of light
when the stars are out tonight
we can make it there, we can make it all alright

might drift until we die
and reflect that lonely sky
but i'm fine if i just have you by my side

i made you a promise i'll keep
though we are just two bodies of water

cold as ice again
you won't come around
i can be a friend
but you want to drown

we'll catch a glimpse of light
when the stars are out tonight
we can make it there, we can make it all alright

might drift until we die
and reflect that lonely sky
but i'm fine if i just have you by my side

i made you a promise i'll keep
though we are just two bodies of water

but you want to drown

That Red Barn

Yo.

Today was cool. I accepted my co-op job for the fall. I got some sweet pictures for my presentation. We went out into the field and I got to be the photographer. lol.

This is another one of those cases where I wished I was just 10% honest with you, but we'll see what happens.

Today after work I went home. I think my gym membership is dead now. So I am only going to get one more month so I have a few days off now and at the end of August I think. Shortly after getting home I skyped with a buddy and we did a Bible study / book study. Today was largely about the Holy Spirit and something I never thought about came up.

So, like, Jesus was with His disciples, and then He went to the cross and was gone for a bit. But this was for the best, aside from the whole paying for our sin and giving us new life in Him (which is the best part), He also made the way for the Holy Spirit to be poured out on everyone. Instead of having to be with Jesus physically, or in the very center of the temple to experience God you actually just had God's Spirit in you all the time. "I am with you always".

I also got stuck outside my house for the first time today. Left my keys on my table when I went out to return the guitar. TT.TT Had to ring everyone's doorbell. (I only rang 4 of 24. Everyone is a hyperbole.)

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Uneeded Things

Hey guys,

today is one of those days. I did what seems like so much work, but probably wasn't that much. I'm pretty sure research isn't where I should be. I need things to be changing way more often. I don't like focusing on one thing for so long with no results. >.> But it seems like grade 10 math teacher is viable. My friend in Toronto has asked me how to do some stuff and (although I needed to google it and relearn) I helped her figure it out and fully know how to do it myself now. lol.

So, this might sound weird, but I just cut my toe nails and I guess this made me think... "When was the last time I bit my toenails?" lol... I kinda have a bad habit of biting my finger nails. I have no idea how to get over this, but I guess I outgrew biting my toenails. Like, it's pretty hard to do now. lol. Who needs nail clippers when you can just use your teeth? I guess that's an embarrassing confession..? I told you if I had nothing I'd do this. haha.

I can't believe I only have 4.5 weeks left here in Saskatoon. I'm gonna accept the job offer tomorrow for my next co-op term back in Ottawa.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

PS. I also meant to rant about how I can't wake up before 7:50. and then I remembered that God answers prayer. I was kinda apologizing for not knowing anyone in my building and then coming home from groceries a girl was moving into the unit beside mine. =D New friend? Not really, but I offered her help and she can knock on my door if she ever has questions. She said that's so helpful. xP

Clarity

Today was generally unproductive.

I started watching a new anime a week ago, just one episode, but ended up watching the rest of the curretly released episodes this weekend. lol... Cannot wait til next week for episode 16. haha.

I probably watched way too much youtube.

I didn't really accomplish much housework-wise. I guess I did a lot of sewing. haha. Finished fixing my shirt. Now all the buttons work! Hasn't been that way in years. lol.

But I went to church twice again and both times were pretty sweet. First YF brings a friend to church, which is awesome. And later the guy I meant to talk to about discipleship a month ago talks to me and says we should meet up. xP

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Short Words Can Be Scary Too

I don't know what I can say and what I can't say.

There are things I will or won't say.

There are things I will only say in my head.

There are things better left unsaid.

But there are also things that should be said; things that cannot be unsaid.

The things you cannot say over a text; the things you cannot tell you friend to say for you.

Yet I still refuse to say those words.

The words that have potential to change futures. The words that reveal the past and present. The words that will bring about a full understanding of each other and push our relationships to new heights.

There are many reasons why some people can't say these words and also why others can throw them around too easily.

But even these words are confusing. Even this short phrase doesn't capture the fullness of the situation easily.

But I don't want to talk very long, who knows what the reaction could be. If I say less words it is easier for both of us, right? But then there can be misunderstanding.

>.>

Words.

"It Has No 'Flavour'"

It's been one of those weeks. I probably haven't had one like this all summer though.

So many late days and sleeping in.

I've missed multiple breakfasts and my lunches took a toll.

I've had three skype meetings this week 8-9pm or so, I went out to see Pacific Rim Tuesday night (such a great movie) and got home at 1 to then spend an hour writing and sending an email got to bed at 3. Woke up late (no lunch left in the fridge). I think I had three bananas and two peaches left. That night after a short time at the gym we went out for sushi. xP Also I got to officially meet W(?) and W(?). We went to pool after sushi until midnight. Got home, passed out, woke up late. Decided I could not do anything Thursday because I needed to do dishes, cook, clean, and all this other stuff. So I didn't go to the gym. Got a bunch done I think..? Managed to get a free lunch yesterday by going to a seminar. lol Free subway is probably a bit better than the half bag of dry mr. noodles, a pepper, and four uncooked hotdogs. lol... Went to bed at midnight. Woke up exhausted and half an hour late to leave. >.< Tonight I got to go to "The Taste of Saskatchewan" event downtown. xP. Good times. I went with YF and his friend P(?). Good times eating, joking and laughing. "Someone must always make a sacrifice, today, that is me." Haha.

Gotta sleep.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

July 14th Unknown Hour ~8:45-9pm ish

"This situation is pretty funny. I mean, I was having dinner and watching anime and then the lights went off kinda suddenly. Like all of them. So I finished watching the show (it had managed to load fully. lol) and then kinda just went around the building. I felt like this was one of those times where complete strangers would band together for the common good simply because they live near each other. lol. Not exactly.

I guess cell phones get in the way, however, I did not have mine. I had left it in FB's car accidentally. >.>

I went out on the balcony to see what was happening outside. It seemed to really get people going. I have never seen so many people outside by my house. They all seemed to be walking in the same direction: towards the landlord's office. So I went too. I was disappointed to not find a crowd, but whatever. He tried calling Sasktel. Busy. As far as he knew, a couple blocks in each direction (but North) were out too. He figured since we are on a rural grid, someone may have hit a pole and set it all off, potentiall for a while.

So, I set off to find power.

Rather, I am going to go to work (the direction that had power). FB had kidnapped me from work yesterday, so my bike was still there. When I started writing this I was sitting at the bus stop. One bus, only going to the nearby mall, appeared. So I asked about transfers (I usually just take one bus).

Not today.

?

Sunday night there are no buses apparently. Since it was close she didn't charge me (Yuss! I only had one ticket left. xP). So I walk.

Now I am maybe halfway? I'm playing  with the idea of hitch hiking. CW would approve and it would be fun. lol. So far I ran into a Chinese lady with a bike. She didn't know about it all. Her English was not great, so now I am prepared for the next one (probably sketchily prepared): 我的家没有电气。你的家有没有吗. (getting eaten alive by mosquitos)."

So I kinda ran the rest of the way..?

Anyways, I'm about to bike home. It was like 10:45 when I ended up getting here and is now 11:40. >.>

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Sorry for being lazy.

Today was a long day at work. I ended up staying til 7 then was doing other stuff online til 9:15. XP.

Met up with YF for lunch. A little talk I guess. It's kinda funny how I want to talk more about God with him, but we actually have other things to talk about. I never have other things to talk about with anyone. Lolll. Good times though. I'm gonna miss him when I leave in seven weeks. T.T

Anyways, I'm going to bed. Lol. Below is the manuscript for the testimony I gave at Alpha last week. Thirty or so people, many who do not know Jesus as their saviour yet. Glad to be able to speak and share a bit of God's plan in my life.

"Unlike some whose first time at an Alpha course was 7 weeks ago, for me it was five and a half years ago. But like many, I came because a friend who invited me to go. I didn't really know what to expect, maybe some games, maybe some videos. Time with my friend.

What I found was life changing, a time to meet and get to know a new friend, named Jesus. Over the weeks of the course I heard about God and His love for us, but also about our sin, the wrong things we have done that separate us from God. Lying, stealing, cheating on a test. Each of us have it, but no good deeds, could make up for them. Jesus came down to earth to take our punishment and die for each of us and rose again. Now we can ask for His forgiveness and ask Him into our lives.

For a couple years I tried to just fit Jesus into my life. Go to church, prayer meetings, help out at church, while living my life the rest of the time. That isn't how it works though. God doesn't want us to give Him an hour Sunday morning, he wants us to know Him and be in relationship with Him. Experience Him in every aspect of our lives.

I asked Jesus to come into my life about 4 years ago, and since then have been baptised and seen Him do amazing things in my life as well as the lives of people everywhere I've been; Canada, America, Asia, Africa, but this was still a lesson I need to learn more each day. I think alpha course this time has really helped me to see this more. Talks on prayer and walking with the Spirit and trusting God in every moment. And actually each morning before alpha I ended up reading a passage in the Bible that was talked about later. This just further showed how God is act work all the time and how His plans are not restricted to the church building.

I have been so blessed by God's plans for me here in Saskatoon and want to learn more and more what it means to trust in Him wherever He sends me, whatever time or place.

If you don't know Jesus, or if you have for a while, I encourage you to seek Him more. Taste and see that He is good."

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Well Fed

I have food again. lol.

I was down to like 3 carrots, 4 boxes of KD, 3 cans of tuna, and random little bits of stuff. >.>

Bought a lot of groceries. Probably enough for the rest of the summer aside from more vegetables.

I also bought an avocado and ate it. =D

So today I had some interviews. One went very well I think, the other not so much. lol...

Had a really good lab meeting, all the background information for everything we are doing. Now I fully understand.

Ummmm. ya. Got to talk with PG a bit after work. I finally stopped being a coward, prayed, and just asked him how he knew about SCAC. He apparently goes to the only other Chinese church in Saskatoon, and has gone pretty regularly for more than 3 years and his parents back in China are Christian. So, I look forward to talking more to him about what it all means to him, and he said I could come to church with him sometime. xP And because his church is sharing a building the service is at 2, so I could actually go between SCAC and the other church I'm going to. But, three churches..? Hmmmmmm.....?

Ya. haha.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Thorns Hurt

Hey guys,

last night I got to talk with a brother who struggles with a lot of the same things I do. It was really good to be real and talk about these things and know that someone else has gone through this all and still is trying to hold onto Christ as best he can. It was really encouraging. The first time I heard his testimony I was very impressed with the boldness he had in even being able to tell it.

Hypothetical question:
You are on your death bed. Would you rather have healing or forgiveness?

Now I fully understand that the question is vague and no context and ya, but I think I just realized how this applies to my situation.

At alpha I was going to say forgiveness; But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins. Matt 6:15

But I guess I've been living the first answer, that I'd rather have healing.

"Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Cor 12:7b-10

Paul wasn't healed, but he was still was able to see God use his life to change the eternities of multitudes.

I don't like this answer.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Field of Vision

So, yesterday was microscope day!

The microscope I had been using until this week had the fluorescent lamp's bulb die (of old age), so it needs to be replaced... Meantime, I am still requiring a microscope for hours each day and the other one is usually being used, so I need to check each day it's availability. Yesterday I had it 8:30-10:30 and I needed to get to work early to make sure I could finish the staining / destaining process before then because I had 5 samples and WZ was going to have a few, adn they each take 15-30 minutes or so if done thoroughly.

So, I slept in a bit. Bad morning. Biked. Got 3 of 5 done for 8:45ish, left WZ to finish for me. Got on the microscope and she tells me I have until 3? Ok. =D No pressure. WZ comes in with all the samples prepared. He had 10. >.< . . .

Ya... I ended up on the microscope straight through lunch until 2:54. >.< But!!! I got to see cool fungal structures!!! =D So, I'm not too upset. lol.

Last Alpha Course session about the church and telling others. YF said he wants 'someone to be nice to him as he slowly learns to trust in God, no pressure'. But it's true, God has definitely been slowly at work in him. So, I don't really want to push, but it would be so awesome if he did come to know Jesus as his saviour now so we could do discipleship stuff. >.>

Today was not much. Tower Defense. Pokémon Tower Defense 2. lol..... >.< So much wasted time.

So, I'm still going through the New Testament this summer and posting my thoughts on my other blog. Cool stuff: people from Kazakhstan, Pakistan, and Cuba (as well as a lot of the other countries that have seen this blog) have seen posts.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Not Registering

Yo, so it's that time of year again. Everyone is registering for courses for the coming fall.

I'm not?

Well, I actually am, which is odd. It's also odd that that is odd. I mean, I haven't graduated, so why would it be odd for me to register? Co-op. I have two more terms this year, so I'm not gonna be at school full time again until nest September, like 2014. But I am thinking of applying for a course or two to make my last year easier since I am allowed to take a course or two.

So, ya. I'm registering? I have a very limited selection having only classes that are between the hours of 6-9pm. Hmmmm..... Plus I want it to help me so I can take less courses next year, and hopefully really easy ones next year, so hopefully I can take a single 'hard-ish' course each semester. Seems like I have no choices if I want to do that. It's so weird... I actually want to take Bioinformatics really badly despite knowing it will suck. haha.

Shoot. . . If I take classes, I will have to go to school? >.> Hmmm. That may ruin my plans. . . Let's find an online course for the fall! =D

. . . (Three hours later)

Ok! All fixed up. xP. Hopefully this will all work out as I have been hoping. I guess I should pray about my plans too.

Anyways, ya... with all this registrations stuff I kinda stayed up late last night and didn't wake up until 9. >.< Everything was ok though. I just missed a boring meeting that was irrelevant to me.

Got to talk with PG a bit more. Praying that I'd be able to share the hope and security I have in Christ with him soon.

I got the package from FedEx Ground yesterday. Only open 8-12 and 4-6:30 and it's 30 minutes by car away. Like, it's at the furthest North point of the city. Past the correctional facility. >.> It's a bunch of 'Exploration Bible's with Bible studies for people who have never read the Bible before. DH was really curious about it and KA was restraining interest, but FB is still as adamant as ever that I need to cut out the Bible studies from my schedule and go to the gym more. Hopefully we can have a discussion through this.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

A California Driver's License

Hey guys.

Yesterday was ok. My first Canada Day away from Ottawa, the capital city. Not much happened until 6pm. I kinda slept in, cooked a bit, checked out the "gym" in my condo complex (super old running equipment and a monstrous machine for every type of weight training), then sewing my shirt back into one piece. lol.

At 6 I met YF and his friend P(?) to go to the main event. It was at this giant park and there was just a lot of people, a small stage, and a million booths selling stuff. Also some inflatable games we didn't play. Got to learn a bit about P(?) who is from Mexico where she studied immunology.

I found an awesome gospel tract on the ground. It looked like a wallet! So we were all like "I wonder whose wallet this is?" Surprise! =D And so we went through the personality test on the inside largely about lying and stealing, which quickly gets into sin and what God did about it all. YF was helping keep the conversation going and was asking her questions. xP. I got to have great conversation with P(?) about grace and the law and learned a bit about her experience in the Catholic church in Mexico. By this point it was almost firework time and YF was really distracted. >.> lol... oh well. next time.

Had no idea what was going to happen this day, but just keep your eyes on Him, His Kingdom and His righteousness, eh?

Today was boring. lol.

Ttyl.

D.Fa




PS. Pakistan!

A chair and a laptop

Pretty much wasted the whole day I think.

It kinda really annoys me that KA will not do anything 'social' outside of work hours. Like, how am I supposed to get to know you when we only get to talk for like 20 minutes at lunch 3 or 4 times a week? And even then he hardly talks. >.<

And sitting here all day is so useless.

>.<

D.Fa

The Goal is Holiness in Christ

Sometimes I wish I could just be honest with you. like 100%. Cause there's so much I wish I could just get off my chest right now, but here in this forum like this isn't the way it should happen. Some things are better left unsaid until better figured out and, no offense, but my blog is nearly never going to be the first to hear anything from me.

Anyways, yesterday was kinda boring. lol. It was like official cleaning day at work, so we had a meeting at 9 am to organize ourselves and then got to it at 10. Our lab was by far the messiest. Like stuff from 40 years ago? Stuff from people who have never worked with anyone still in the lab. >.> Additionally, it is a pretty big space.

I actually had to dip the last half of the meeting because I had an interview to do on the phone. On two days notice I had to email everyone in the co-op office to get the interview onto a media I could do (phone or skype instead of in Ottawa in person). It was figured out, but then the interview was pushed back an hour.

At lunch FB came with me to have lunch with YF. LOL. I think it was a good time. Now FB can't make fun of my 'asian friends' as much and it actually wasn't as bad as I thought it might be. lol.

Alpha as always was sweet. Talked about healing, a topic I am quite skeptical of. But like, it's called a miracle because it goes beyond what is normally possible. A miracle is hard to believe because it is, hard to believe based on normal conditions. It is like being able to see a tiny bit of what God is actually capable of. The non-Christians in our group were very skeptical of it and asked if any of us had actually seen someone healed, which a few girls had. But they also wanted to emphasize that physical healing isn't the most important thing. If you are healed physically, you are still gonna die. If you are healed spiritually, there is so much more left for you whenever you do pass from this life to eternity.

Today: sin. Mewtwo Strikes Back (with the 10 minutes that were removed about the girl who died and mewtwo's childhood which should never have been removed. >.<). Dish washing / laundry. Missed a bus. Finally read the Bible. Bussed downtown. Messaged a brother about my sin (good talk. Really blessed to have met him recently). Watched a couple hours of JazzFest with some friends (so many songs from Dixie band. The second band, like literally every song was from our song package, and in the same arrangement. >.>). FREE PC brand food. xP. Bussed home with an interesting talk with a guy whose name I never got. Now I'm here, still grieving.

*sigh*

But I know God is greater and even this somehow is in His plans for the greater good. Lessons to learn. Humility to remember. Gotta get the Spirit to help me stay on track, cause this sucks.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

PS. Greece. Sweet.

Don't Drown

I have an interview tomorrow so this will be written in less than 5 minutes.

So, for the last few days I have been very serious about taking my breaks at work. Not just because looking through a bright microscope for hours hurts my eyes, but also because I have kinda been missing breakfast a bit and breakfast is when I read the Bible, so I really need to prioritize that.  So at 10 and 3 I got upstairs to the old lunch break room place and read and pray. It has been a really sweet week and I think I have really heard God speak to me, whether or not I like what He said. Today FB found out that I was taking breaks up there. He's kinda against Bible reading and Bible studies and everything, so when he got up there we just had to play pool instead of letting me keep reading. lol.  Pool is cool I guess. I really pray FB would be open t going through a Bible study himself in a week or two.

Talk to you later.

D.Fa

Excited

Yo.

So I guess I said I would tell you some things. lol

As I tweet, I am really excited. xP

A friend I met a year or so ago met one of my friends. I only got to spend a little bit of time with him, so we didn't get to talk all that much about Jesus or anything, but he had a bunch of good conversations with him about the Bible and Christ. xP. He even was thinking about sin and came up with an analogy of a dot on a piece of paper. I had never actually heard that before so that's sweet. xP

Additionally, my friend YF really enjoyed the Alpha retreat and had a lot of fun and it was great getting to spend more time with him outside of the food court or church. lol. He also started reading the book I got him about Science and faith in God. xP. Says he's really relating to the concerns raised by Lee Strobel. The book is called "Case for a Creator" and I really enjoyed it. Strobel, as a journalist, goes to the experts to ask questions about science's portrayed incompatibility with faith, and along the way everything that had caused them to become atheistic originally now were actually in support of intelligent design and God.

Anyways, ttyl.

D.Fa

我们一起吃

Yo.

It's been a couple days, eh? Ya. It has been. lol.

It was a couple days where I didn't get back home until like 12.

Friday there was no Alpha course at night so I told FB we should do something. He had been sick all week, so it was a long time. We went to Costco and then back to his house. He made spaghetti and we watched Bleach. lol. Filler episodes. >.> Then we ended up watching Superbad. The trailers made it look way better than it actually was. The last five minutes were okay though. lol. I don't think too many people cared, but the moral of the story seemed to be that you shouldn't do all this stupid stuff to impress the girl. Just be yourself. But that kinda gets lost among all the highschool drunkenness and cops who should never have received badges. >.> Not recommended.

So I got home late. lol. Sleep. Immediately.

Next morning. Saturday. Wake up at 7. Picked up at 8 and away we go. Alpha camp weekend. xP Drove like 20 minutes away, a small town called Aberdeen. Apparently, a couple who had been going to SCAC had moved out there and opened a restaurant which also has a large room suitable for us. We watched three sessions with two group discussion times. It was really good. YF asked a bunch of good questions and we really discussed the work of the Holy Spirit. It's a little funny how cultural norms are just different. Like I would feel awkward having a conversation about each of our thoughts on premarrital sex, but not our group. lol... But ya. Good talks about the Holy Spirit.

At lunch I got to meet this group of guys that I thought were all in highschool. Nope. All in University. We went bowling after. This 19 year old killed it. He got like 158. lol. it was fun.

Later that night we were going to go for KTV with some of the others that hadn't come with us. So we chilled around downtown for a bit. Art gallery. Chase a rainbow. Dinner at a vietnamese restaurant.

KTV was good. I learned so much Chinese. lolll

Today was pretty standard. Well, for me anyways. lol. I read a lot of awesome things, but I'll save it for tomorrow.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Who's There?

*knock knock knock*

*knock knock knock* "205??"

*knock knock* "205..?"

"Is everything ok? Your door was ajar."

So, kinda odd way to wake up.

Ya, I often forget to lock, and sometimes even close my door when I get home and once I'm here I usually don't leave. So, that happened. Awkward.

Today I had a lab meeting and gave a summary of what I've been doing to our lab supervisor guy who is always in another province. Interesting.

It started raining as I biked home. >.>

Applied for a job. Pray for that. Thanks.

D.Fa

Forgot the Word for Water

Yo.

I got a application for a job to finish by tomorrow at midnight.

Today was cool. I got to talk to KC, like a new KC who went to Brock about his heart for and call from God about student ministry. Pretty cool.

I was on the microscope all day. not cool. lol.

Everyone in the lab now knows that I speak some Chinese. lolll.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

He Will Be My Light!

Yo.

I want to get out of this valley already.

I've been just digging deeper, and each time I tried to climb out I slip back further.

But this is it. I'm done.

I've stopped long enough to realize there was a rope ladder on the other side attached to a helicopter ready and waiting to pull me out and upwards.

Multiple times this week God has just been so clearly planning everything. Like on Friday I was texting a bro and talking about a verse in Psalm 119. I was feeling really down about what I had done that morning, so on my break I ended up reading the whole psalm. Later that night was Alpha and it was about the Bible, God's word. And they mentioned Psalm 119 a few times since it is a psalm all about God's word.

Saturday, I don't know what I was doing, but I googled 'Christian pickup lines'. They are all hilarious, trust me. lol. Sunday night's sermon started with a verse I had read in the comments on one of those pages. Psalm 56:1a "be merciful to me, O God, for men hotly pursue me" (read out of context it is a verse many women have joked about including the speaker that night). But her talk was really great. David called out in danger, but also praised God for the fact that He fulfills His promises and although still in the situation, God will work and get him through it. And the last verse of the psalm is really great too.

Psalm 56:13 "For you have delivered me from death and my feet from stumbling, that I may walk before God in the light of life."

God has freed us from slavery to sin, from fear of death, from all of the punishment we deserve so we could walk in light and life. That's amazing. He did it. Not us.

A sister sent me this verse and encouragement about sin: " “Do not be afraid,” Samuel replied. “You have done all this evil; yet do not turn away from the Lord, but serve the Lord with all your heart. Do not turn away after useless idols. They can do you no good, nor can they rescue you, because they are useless. For the sake of his great namethe Lord will not reject his people, because the Lord was pleased to makeyou his own. (1 Samuel 12:20-22)

This has always encouraged me when sin seems so big. Even though we have done evil, we don't have to be afraid to come to God. And out of fear for the Lord, we RUN to him to walk in the light and He is the Light! 

God is bigger! God wants us still! "

So my prayer right now for all of this situation is out of Psalm 119:

Psalm 119:132-133 "Turn to me and have mercy on me, as you always do to those who love your name. Direct my footsteps according to your word; let no sin rule over me."

As well as praise for Him, knowing that He is greater than sin and can set us free.

So, ya. Walk in the light. Seek His guidance and power to fight temptation. Trust in His goodness and plans.

D.Fa




PS. This song is great too.

May They Be Brought to Complete Unity (John 17:23)

Hey.

Do you know what communion is? It is this thing in church when we eat part of a loaf of bread, or a cracker, and drink a thimble of juice or wine. That is what it literally is, but it has so much more meaning than that. This we do in remembrance of Jesus' sacrifice on the cross, where his body (represented by bread or crackers) was broken and his blood (represented by juice or wine) was poured out for the forgiveness of our sins and for us to be made new in Him. So when we do that we remember Him and what He did. It is also done together with other Christians as a reminder that we were all adopted into God's family through this act on the cross.

So, ya, ever since I first saw communion back in like grade 10 I wanted to do it together with everyone. I couldn't wait to be baptized (I didn't understand what it all meant at the time). When I was finally baptized I did know what it meant. It meant dying to self and being made alive in Christ again. From that point on I never turned down communion. It means so much to me that God would send Jesus to die on the cross for me despite my many imperfections, selfishness and sin, as well as the body known as the church and how supportive and encouraging they have been being able to take it together with them, unified in Christ and by the Spirit.

So, why did I turn down communion the last two weeks?

I was so pissed at that church for their lack of welcoming newcomers that I pretty much disowned them as a legit church, which is absolutely not my place to make that judgment. Absolutely not.

I was just being bitter, selfish and prideful.

Each week I felt this conviction that what I was doing was wrong. They are a part of the body of Christ too. Not perfect, in the same way that I am not perfect. But rejecting them was like rejecting God.

So when I finally gave in and asked God to help me forgive them, asd then took communion with them I think this was a pretty big thing. >.>

Anyways, ttyl.

D.Fa

Dim Sum and Dads

Definitely the first time.

Today is Father's day. For sure the first time I have ever called my Dad to say 'happy father's day'. Kinda slept in, got a drive to church. Today was a guest pastor speaking about marriage. Seemed phrased a bit like a list of things tp.do and things not to do, but it was ok. Lol. "Tell your wife she is a beautiful doe."

After we went for Dim Sum! XD So good. Mmmmmm. With 15 people it is also cheaper. Lolll. Was only 12$ for so much tasty food. S(?) is crazy. He seemed to know all the waiters. His French is not good though. Lol.

Fun times.

Got home and called my dad. My mom is doing a lot better, otherwise things stay the same. KFA is still not doing anything productive, Max is still being a crazy puppy.

I didn't tell them I will be in Ottawa for the fall yet.

Oh! I was watching a video the other day. Andrew Huang grew up in Ottawa?!??!?!! He has to do a show there eventually. Yes. Now we wait.

Anyways. Ttyl.

D.Fa

PS. I think I will know so much Chinese by the end of the summer. XP

Saturdays are Slow

Yo. Saturdays are so lazy. lol.....

I feel like I never get anything done on weekends.

I guess I slept in, read some news (very rare), did laundry, dishes, cooked the last three brown bananas, uploaded pictures, am nearly done writing an update, but otherwise not much.

Started a prayer group for EA'14. There's three of us confirmed that want to go really badly, so it's like, let's dream a bit bigger, what can we ask God to do, how many people do we want to see come with us? =D So today we are gonna pray about what God would have us pray for. It'd be easy to just ask for us to be able / called to go. 3/3 But it'd be crazy to say, ask for 10 people to go with us, which was the sum of everyone who went on a project this year. o.O But anything is possible with God, right?

So ya. Not much happens on Saturdays, especially when FB is sick so we don't crash his house and watch movies. >.<

Anyways, ttyl.

D.Fa

Where are the Men?

Today was by far the most boring day of work. On a computer all day looking at colourful dots. >.<

But Alpha course was really good. Today was about how to read the Bible. Always good discussions.

So, I'm trying to find some guy who is older than me to be like, good influence, and disciple me. Today I focused on getting to know one guy who said he was 27. I thought he was in highschool last week until he drove away. lol. So, he is actually 27. >.< lol..... But he's still very young in his faith. Only heard about Christ 8 years ago, and has only been going to church regularly for 1 year now. He's a really cool guy and hilarious, but I feel like I need to be encouraging him to grow in a relationship with Christ. >.>

Ah. I don't want to be at the top of the food chain, so to speak.

So I guess I need to talk more with the other guy who is older than me who hasn't said out loud that he isn't Christian. I don't really want to talk to the pastor... lol... Reminds me too much of AN. >.> lol.

And there's always AB to meet up with.

Ah.

Why is discipleship so hard?

D.Fa

Faith without Action is Dead

Yo. So when stuff happens I just gotta blog. Tell someone. Share my joy. XP.

So today I got to meet up with YF for lunch again. And not too long in he asked me to help explain the first couple chapters of John. He had read them twice. XP. We really didn't get too into it with only like 40 minutes, but it was a good talk about prophets and sin and prayer.

One thing he mentioned that he thinks is stupid about relying on God is that you then don't do anything. The analogy we came to was about finding a job. People relying on God will sit at home and pray for a job. Very unlikely (not impossible though). You gotta get out there and put hard work in so you can get that job. I totally agree. If I want a job I need to apply, but at the same time I can ask God to help me: give me the right opportunities, words to say in interviews, help making decisions, peace while uncertain about the future, etc. The saying goes 'do your best, and let God do the rest' not 'expect God to do it all 'cause you're lazy'...

There was a story of someone drowning, waiting for God to help in a miraculous way. He drowned because he didn't accept the help God sent in seemingly ordinary ways.

Gotta keep our eyes open for what God is doing.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Why I Don't Normally Buy Butter, Eggs, or Flour

Transplanting barley on what appeared to be a lab field trip was hilarious.

That was my day. lol.

Then I had an interview. Ate the rest of my 'banana cream pie'. Then I washed the dishes. Made cookie dough.

That was my night.

Gotta sleep. Bye.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Josiah was 8 Years Old

Yo. I actually woke up on time today! =D

>.< Was exhausted by 3:30... lol.

Oh well. I gotta make sure I sleep earlier today. >.>

After work was the semi-weekly P2C book study and today I was leading. All new people again! =D >.< So, no one read the chapter..? Instead we just read the Bible. xP. The chapter was all about Josiah's revival and the things he did as a young man and how we can learn from him. So we read 2 Chr 34 and talked about what he did. Then we got into the book and looked at the five things Josiah was and I basically asked "how is that important to revival?" and let the discussion go until awkward silence. lol Bible studies aren't that hard. I wish I had three extra Old Testaments though. Cell phones are not allowed at my Bible studies.

Anyways,

ttyl.

D.Fa

Broken

[June 8]

Hey, so today was interesting.

It was pouring all morning... Woke up frantically at 7 for nothing. So I went to sleep. Woke up at 9 semi-frantically and waited hours for nothing. I was supposed to have an interview at 9 am Saskatchewan time. I haven't heard back yet about what happened. ... Next Saturday. >.> Ok. Lol.......

Anyways, the rest of the day was different. Dim sum, Menchie's, work, dubbed Bleach anime, pizza at FB's, and Kill Bill Vol.1.

Yeah.

Rom 1:30 speaks of those who have turned from the knowledge of God to their passions. They 'invent new ways of sinning' says the NLT translation.

Honestly, I have seen this in my life. So many things can become a means to sin. So many. And then you never see it the same way. It is then always a foothold the devil brings back to haunt us.

I cannot overcome sin on my own. I cannot.

My flesh doesn't want me to.

I couldn't change if I tried, I couldn't change even if my flesh wanted to.

But what is impossible for man is possible with God.

Seeking His Kingdom and righteousness; being filled and lead by the Spirit of power; walking in the forgiveness of Christ which leads to repentance; experiencing the firm, but loving embrace of God each day as He disciplines and teaches.

He can change us, even if we can't.

I'm praying He gives me faith, to trust what he says, to see His goodness and the greatness of His love.

I know I am broken, but if I give You this life, You can do something with it.

Free Time

Yo. Today was the first day that I have had a drive to church from someone who wasn't my housemate in a long time. J(?) picked me up and we went to school to pick up YF.

Service was interesting. Today was Mandarin / Cantonese with English in the headphones. We left pretty quickly after service so I didn't get to talk to the pastor about getting an English / Chinese Bible for YF, but in the meantime I let him borrow one of mine.

I waste way too much time when there's nothing due.

I went to church again tonight, but AB is apparently on business trip for another week. >.> So I don't know what to do. I think I need to pray more about this church because I'm really stuck on this whole not forgiving them for not welcoming me. >.<

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Sovereign means His Plans are Higher

Yo. Have I ever told you that God has it all figured out?

Well, ya, He does.

Today I got to have lunch with my friend again. As usual we talked about seemingly random things. I kinda feel bad after these lunches for not being able to share the good news, the hope I have, Christ, more during the conversations, but I just prayed for a chance to after work before going to church.

And that is exactly what happened. xP

I was just reading my Bible when he got to the place we were meeting. And he asked what book is that? He then flipped to the table of contents and asked what the difference between old and new testament is, and if I had read it all, which just led to more good conversation about the Bible. He's actually amazed by how many people's lives have been changed by this book. He asked where he could buy one, and (this may or may not be a valid assumption) thought he could buy one at the book store. o.O Is that possible??? The closest 'Christian store' is like really far away. >.> So hopefully. =P

Yeah, so our friend picked us up and we went to church. Friday night is Alpha course. It's week 4, so I hope I can go through week 1-3 material with my friend during our lunches or something. Alpha course starts with a home cooked meal. So good time to meet people and laugh at people. lol. Next was trilingual worship. Sweeeeeeet. Then a video. Today's topic was prayer. Really good. Small group time to discuss. I'm in the old group again. lol. Found out our friend and his wife were trying to have a baby for a long time and their parents were getting really pushy. His wife prayed like Hannah that if God would make her pregnant the baby would be named Samuel. A couple weeks later it was confirmed. He was doubtful, what if it's a girl? Nope. Samuel is 4 months away now. =D Yet, he still has trouble trusting in God? My friend asked a bunch of good questions and seems to have really been listening and trying to learn. I hope to give him a Bible soon and discuss whatever he wants to about what he reads.

Seriously, Alpha was awesome. I love God's family. SCAC is definitely my home for the summer.

Thank God for my friend, thank God for SCAC, thank God for even bringing me here.

His plans are higher than ours, but they all work for the good of those who love Him.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

If I was a Stranger to the Church

So, I haven't told you about the church I've been going to on Sunday night. Last week was my first time and this week was my second. I'm sure that it is a good church, but the evening service has one small problem and it kinda pissed me off.

I have been getting angry easily lately, and I don't know why, but this one is for real.

So, church hopping. Trying to find a good church by going to a number and really trying to figure out where God wants you for the next while. I thought this was a good idea. I'd get to see a bunch of different churches. I've really only been to OCBC. It was my first time at a Lutheran church a couple weeks ago. It was my first night service a couple weeks ago. But there are things that I am looking for in a church.

I am looking for a community of passionate believers that seeks to understand God's word better and put it into practice each day. A community that I can call a family because of the warmth and love found there. I want discipleship to encourage and rebuke those who are younger and point them back to Christ.

One thing I really wanted to see was a dedication to welcoming newcomers, as a sign of prioritizing outreach to those who are both new or who are still seeking to know more about God.

So it was really annoying that no one approached me, the guy sitting alone whom you've never seen before, in either last week or this week's service. That includes the 15 minutes before and after.

So, this week's service I was just praying against this attitude of condemnation against the church, I was praying for them and those who might walk in. As I mentioned the other day my friend had walked in looking for help and God really provided by my cell phone, CAA membership and everything, she had a church background and was fine asking me for help, but if someone who knew nothing about God walked in and was too shy to approach someone they might walk away without getting the chance to feel what the church body as a family can be when they invite others in to share in the joy they have in Christ, when they go out of their way to offer friendship, assistance, and ultimately hope to those in need.

So I was so angry, not for me, but for those who could walk in and walk out.

I was just about to walk out and not come back.

Then AB approached me while carrying his son. lol. With like 30-40 young adults I would have expected one of them to do something, but this is good too. He said we could meet up for lunch or coffee some time. So I am looking forward to that.

Grace.

We did not approach Jesus, the stranger in our world. How would God have felt? And then they crucified Him.

Gotta forgive as He forgave us in Christ.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

A Bowl of Beef and Noodles.

I was just about to write a post about church last night then realized I didn't post about what happened in the morning. Lol.

So, my friend. ...

Ok. I guess I need to start even earlier than yesterday... Lol...

It was the camping trip. Remember how I met a bunch of Chinese international students going to UofS? One of them wa studying Biochem for his masters. I ended up meeting up with him to give back the fishing rods we borrowed, which was kinda awkward because we had lost a part. >_< But he didn't care. Lol. Instead he asked if I had eaten lunch yet, and we went to the food court and talked over lunch.

It was a really good conversation. XP. Afterwards, I was texting him and keeping in touch. I was really hoping to become good friends and then eventually share the gospel. XP

He added me on facebook. Ok.

I think it was Thursday night. I was talking to a buddy back in Ottawa and then my friend commented on a facebook post I had written about a week earlier.

The post read as follows:

"'Man does not live on noodles and beef alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.' Matt 4:4

If that was how the Bible was written I don't think we'd go for Pho after church anymore. Chinatown Ottawa would lose a lot of business. lol"

He then text me "You go to church?" I told him how I was church hopping right now to which he responded "Cool man. I have been trying to find someone who can lead me. You know to get me access to this stuff. I just have no idea how I can get myself involved in this kind of."

=D

What? ... What?!?!?! ... That's CRAZY!

In less than a week of knowing him, and really only like an hour and a half of talk / text he is asking about church?!

This was one of those "as if this is happening God! This must be why I am here this summer" moments.
And so I asked if we could meet up on Friday to talk more. He had said he had been before, but it sounds like it was a gingerbread house decorating outreach event..? So ths would be his first time at a service. Although I hadn't really planned to, I found out where / when the Saskatoon Chinese Alliance Church had it's English service.

It was a 40 minute bus ride away. Not bad. And guess what? One of the post-docs working with my friend goes to this church!!! =O How is this happening?!?

It was pretty similar to OCBC. Not fully. It was kinda like a good version of the English / Chinese congregation compromised joint services. I was a little not looking forward to a joint service, but with my friend there it makes more sense for it to be a joint service, make sure we both understand. xP

And they have billingual Alpha course on Friday nights? Nice!

I didn't realize how stupid church hopping is until recently. Having brothers and sisters in Christ is an amazing thing. Church hopping means you meet a lot of people, but don't actually get to know them or ever see them again. >.> So, I'm really glad my friend likes this church / he already has two friends here, so why would we leave?

I did want to check out a less conventional church which has people sit facing each other with the cross at the center, so it's focused on Jesus, not on a preacher, but ya, SCAC is sweet. And I'm getting a drive to church now? =D

Ttyl.

D.Fa

Two Strangers in a Strange Church

Yo. Another kinda lazy Saturday. Probably not as productive as I could be.

Ended up playing a bit of Plants vs Zombies, going to Costco with FB and JB, and now we just had pizza and will be going to the movies in about an hour.

Anyways, as I promised, I will now tell a story that I was too tired to tell the last time. XP

So last Sunday after church I planned to go to a Chinese church and then chill around for a little while and go to another church in the evening.

I walked like 40 minutes, not bad, but then the girl at the door told me that the service was only in Mandarin... >.< Oh well.

So I had a lot more time to do nothing. Haha. So I was like writing up my thoughts on a Bible passage.

But where I was sitting had a bunch of mosquitos, so I ended up walking over to the church around 3:30, like 3 hours early.

But then a girl came by to like babysit for one of the worship team members who were practicing at like 4. So we talked breifly, but I ended up reading all the stuff on the walls.

At some point a girl walked in and was kinda freaking out a bit. She ended up asking if she could borrow my phone. She had left her keys in her car and her spare key and phone and everything.

She asked very politely but with an air of desperateness if she could borrow my phone to text someone. See, these days, with cell phones, no one remembers other people's numbers; the phone alone knows. So the only person she knew she texted.

He was far away.

He suggested calling CAA. So she went off and used the church's phone (1-800 number). She came back disappointed. 'The card holder needs to be here in person'. While she had been away I recalled my dad giving me a CAA card, but I probably left it at home, I mean, the car is in Ottawa, what do I need a CAA card for?

I had one.

So she called back using my phone and a long phone call later we were outside on the curb waiting.

She had overheard me say I was from Ottawa to the CAA lady and told me she had gone to school there for a few years, now working as a dental technician, which is sweet. XP Then the guy arrived.

Paperwork.

Then he drove us over (we had to both sit in the front seat. "nice to meet you" was my line after getting out of the truck.) and with little time had opened the door and retreived her keys.

She was very thankful for all th help I had provided. I was just glad I could help. I had no idea what I was gonna do for a few hours before church, but this was sweet. She wanted to repay me. I really didn't need it or want it, but she insisted, so I ended up getting a large frozen lemonade from Timmies.

I wish I needed to go to the dentist while I was here. XP.

Maybe I'll run into her sometime.

I remember praying for her while she was flustered and texting. Wish I had shared more about how it was God's love and faithfulness that had propelled me to act like that.

She was kinda French too. XP. Remimded me of a classmate.

There was a cross on her rearview mirror.

Anyways, I pray God would become more real in Julie's life and I thank God for using me to help her that day. May she walk into more churches in need, and find more help and salvation in Christ.

Ttyl.

D.Fa

[PS. Fast and Furious 6 was really good. But how could they kill them?!?! D=<]

This May or Maynot Become a Thing

So, I have been seeing recently that some people with a blog, or a vlog, or a bunch of people following them will sometimes have certain things they do on certain days of the week. I think this would be good for when I don't have things to say, like now (as long as you don't remember that I have things to tell you about from a couple posts ago. >.>)

So I think one category would be just sheer honesty. Something that could slightly embarrassing / humorous that I probably wouldn't just tell everyone. lol.

So, I probably spend way too much time looking in mirrors, and all that vanity, but one thing I've always wanted to do is try those like nose strip things that you put on wet, let dry, and then peel off leaving your nose really clean. The girls in those commercials always looked really happy. lol.

I don't think my nose is that dirty. >..< but it would be an experience. lol. I just don't want to pay for it, or even bring it to a cash register at a store. lol. Maybe someday I will just happen upon some? =D

Anyways, today was super busy at work, but I get to play with a camera for work!! =DD

Ttyl.

D.Fa

[oops, posted this in the wrong place yesterday. lol]